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Discussion Boards => Off-Topic => Topic started by: BK_Adores_Chase on October 12, 2010, 01:58:06 pm
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I don't like to spank, sometimes I threaten to not let him play his game later or that I'm going to throw his cupcake away if he doesn't listen. I want to use better techniques, ones that I can easily use at the grocery store or something (which not playing game doesn't work in this case). It's always a hassle to get him to get dressed, take a bath, or brush his teeth. When these things arrise he'll run and jump on his bed and even if I yell it doesn't seem to work. What are some discipline ideas that I can use in any situation? I honestly can't think of a time when my son has actually been disciplined, which is what I think the problem is. Time out maybe? I'm sick of the whining when he knows every day, no matter how much he whines, he will still end up in the tub. HELP!
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Maybe you can try Dr. Harvey Karp's method of handling toddlers? :binkybaby:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJ1428uYs2g
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the hardest thing is actually following through.
If you threaten something you must follow through
If you do time out -- you MUST be consistent and there is no FUN to it.
I have a 3 year old and he seems to understand when we are serious
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I don't like to spank, sometimes I threaten to not let him play his game later or that I'm going to throw his cupcake away if he doesn't listen. I want to use better techniques, ones that I can easily use at the grocery store or something (which not playing game doesn't work in this case). It's always a hassle to get him to get dressed, take a bath, or brush his teeth. When these things arrise he'll run and jump on his bed and even if I yell it doesn't seem to work. What are some discipline ideas that I can use in any situation? I honestly can't think of a time when my son has actually been disciplined, which is what I think the problem is. Time out maybe? I'm sick of the whining when he knows every day, no matter how much he whines, he will still end up in the tub. HELP!
you'll regret not spanking him. i'm not a parent myself but i've seen first hand that it is sure fire discpline. Time-outsnver work. as he gets older, you will lose the need to spank him. that early age truly does impact a child's life. I wish my parents didn't stop spanking me when i was little.
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I have a 7 year old, 4 year old, and 2 year old. I use a combination of spanking, time out, and taking away priviledges. The main thing whatever I tell them is their punishment, that's what happens. As far as whining about getting dressed, bath, teeth brushing whatever, I don't yell. I go get them and make them do it (If I have to do it, then I do). My older 2 know that when I say to do it, they will. They don't whine anymore about that stuff. I only spank for the big stuff (hurting each other, getting in trouble at school-which has only happened twice for my 7 year old), things like that. Just be consistent with what you say. Make sure you don't threaten then not do it.
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You're taking the high road by not spanking. Corporal punishment is an easy short-term way to terrify children into submission, but it teaches them that the way to get someone to cooperate is to get violent---not the smartest message to send. My husband raised two incredibly well-behaved sons (now college-educated, gainfully employed, highly responsible & happily married), but he didn't spank them or even hit them with a fly-swatter. His slogan was "Shower them with attention, but don't let them get away with ANYTHING." It was harder work than spanking and slapping, but it has paid off! There must be some websites or message boards that can show you how to raise a non-whiny kid who minds you (without using a belt or fly-swatter)!!!! Hang in there.
i'm
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I don't like to spank, sometimes I threaten to not let him play his game later or that I'm going to throw his cupcake away if he doesn't listen. I want to use better techniques, ones that I can easily use at the grocery store or something (which not playing game doesn't work in this case). It's always a hassle to get him to get dressed, take a bath, or brush his teeth. When these things arrise he'll run and jump on his bed and even if I yell it doesn't seem to work. What are some discipline ideas that I can use in any situation? I honestly can't think of a time when my son has actually been disciplined, which is what I think the problem is. Time out maybe? I'm sick of the whining when he knows every day, no matter how much he whines, he will still end up in the tub. HELP!
MY WHOLE THING ABOUT SPANKING A CHILD REALLY DEPENDS ON WHAT WORKS. FOR ME I NEVER HAD TO SPANK MY CHILD AND TIME OUT ALWAYS DID THE TRICK. EVERY CHILD IS DIFFERENT AND SOME REQUIRE BASIC DISCIPLINE AND OTHERS MAY REQUIRE A MORE STURDY APPROACH. NOW OUT RIGHT WHIPPING IS WRONG SPANKING ONLY SHOULD REQUIRE A HAND UPON A CHILD'S BOTTOM AND NO WHERE ELSE!!
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as others have said...you must be consistent. otherwise, they will never believe you are serious about anything. yes, it's exhausting for the parent. time out works wonders. the time limit is a minute per child's age. I never had to lay a hand on the child I raised. he knew I meant whatever I said...exactly how I said it.
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Yesterday I tried the time out thing and it was AMAZING! I think this will work for now - until he gets older.
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the hardest thing is actually following through.
If you threaten something you must follow through
If you do time out -- you MUST be consistent and there is no FUN to it.
I have a 3 year old and he seems to understand when we are serious
Exactly. Never ever threaten without following through.
Don't say "I'll turn this car around" if you won't, etc.
Try taking away his game or whatever for longer. Toddlers shouldn't need video games anyways. It'll be good for him.
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I'm not sure when it clicked, I must have actually done it at some point.
But... usually only works with not cleaning up her room, I threaten to give away her toys. Now she does it with me asking just one time.
And for whatever reason, she is terrified of me "counting" - once I get to about 2, she is doing what I ask her to.
I agree, you have to follow through with whatever you say you are going to.
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Yeah haha the counting thing does work - funny thing to discover once you're a parent. I say if you don't you get time out on the count of 3 - 1, 2, - and my son usually listens on 2 too! I also decided to start his potty training today. I think I'm just gunna put some regular undies on him and if he starts to pee I'll take him to the bathroom - I'm hoping he'll go before in his pants but he seems to be against the potty. but he tells me when he's going and I heard this is a sign that he's ready.
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each child is unique, what might work for one won't work for the other, be it spanking, timeout, yelling, threatening. you got to be persistant and consistent in how you choose to discipine.
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Put him in timeout or tell him to sit on the step.
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Discipline their mind is the worst thing u can do
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Following through is key - You must make good on all your threats. If you noticed that is not working and the situation warrants a spanking you don't have to be brutal but your child must know you are not have playtime. Most important YOU ARE NOT THEIR FRIEND you are not there to be their best friend until they are out of your house. They must respect you and listen.