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Discussion Boards => Off-Topic => Topic started by: sherryinutah on July 10, 2015, 05:05:23 pm

Title: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: sherryinutah on July 10, 2015, 05:05:23 pm
Let's deal with the reality of changing times.  I'm seeing fewer people getting married.  I respect the fact that it's a personal choice; and personally, I love being single. 

We're living in the year 2015; where, the way things are done has changed.  There was a time when people married; had children together to form a family unit and wife/mother had her role and husband/father had his.  Basically, the woman gave birth to children, nurtured them and kept the home fires burning.  The man brought home the "bacon", took care of "handyman" projects and the husband and wife were co-dependent with each other.  They usually assumed they would spend their entire lives together regardless of how happy or miserable they were with each other. 

The bottom line is that some people are unable to live inside this box.

Now, financial pressures have women leaving their homes to be employed.  There might also be other reasons why women choose to work.  Some women sacrifice their self-worth when they don't have their own pay check.

Some men are better at nurturing their children; than they are at, keeping a job.

Divorce used to be a 4 letter word; however, now it's an option.

Personally, I'm grateful that I have an opportunity to customize a relationship with someone...without....signing a marriage certificate.  For me, the paperwork has become obsolete.  This applies to THIS phase of my life because my children are now adults.  I still believe the marriage commitment is important for young people who want to raise children together.

 :heart:

What do you think?

Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: Nancy5 on July 10, 2015, 07:11:07 pm
I think it's a choice each person has to make for themselves.  Times have changed since my youth, some fir the better, some for the worse.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: ancmetro on July 10, 2015, 07:12:12 pm

      I think it is a very personal choice!
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: BATISTAGIRL663 on July 10, 2015, 08:08:46 pm
this day and time its hard to tell anyone whats right or wrong --you have to search yourself and do what is right for you
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: schoolvan on July 11, 2015, 01:29:10 am
I don't know never married and I don't plan on it.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: gsdoss on July 11, 2015, 06:34:42 am
It isn't an easy answer and up to each couple.The seniors aren't getting married as much.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: linderlizzie on July 11, 2015, 07:23:48 am
Marriage is one of the most basic things that God ordained. I firmly believe that it's good for every part of society. Government loves it that we're not together in any way and are not as strong. That makes it so much easier to control us. Families make America strong.

[There was a time when people married; had children together to form a family unit and wife/mother had her role and husband/father had his.  Basically, the woman gave birth to children, nurtured them and kept the home fires burning.  The man brought home the "bacon", took care of "handyman" projects and the husband and wife were co-dependent with each other.  They usually assumed they would spend their entire lives together regardless of how happy or miserable they were with each other. per sherryinutah] What's wrong with this scenario? I think it sounds perfectly fine!  :male: :female: God created us to complement one another. What a fabulous idea!!

In reality, divorce is not anything new. Men used to marry women and be able to divorce them for any reason. Men used to have women as property. Men and women still have a hard time getting along at times, just as any two people living together have a hard time getting along. When it involves putting the other person first and yourself second, that's a difficult thing. But it makes for more lasting and meaningful relationships.

Do you know the statistics of men in prison who never had a father figure present? It's pretty indicative of how important families are. Studies show that gangs in big cities form so that they can have some sort of "family" to belong to if they don't have one at home. That's a pretty good argument for keeping families intact to me.

Right and wrong has never changed. Only people's perceptions of it change to suit their own purposes.  :sad1:

To anyone I've offended, I'm sorry. Sometimes we have to agree to disagree so that we all respect each other's point of view.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: oldbuddy on July 11, 2015, 07:41:49 am
I don't even see it as a legitimate question. God ordained marriage between a man and a woman and provided a complete instruction manual that I follow. I have been happy being married 44 years and have no plans to change that. Only one of our six children is a confirmed bachelor, but that's just because he has special needs.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: articx on July 13, 2015, 04:07:37 pm
My choice is to not get married. I cannot see a reason to do it, and risks are high.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: jcalexis on July 13, 2015, 04:16:03 pm
 Marriage is a commitment, better yet a vocation. Not every one can commit to marriage which is to spend the rest of your life with someone.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: ricdsm on July 13, 2015, 08:56:14 pm
I have been married 35 years and I thank God for my wife.  I come from a very traditional, conservative perspective and I believe that to be a perspective that has built all great societies.  However, I would agree that sometimes people are not ready to do what is necessary to make a marriage thrive.  If a person is not ready, it is better NOT to marry.  I have seen some phenomenal marriages and I have seen some absolute train wrecks.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: ejholt on July 14, 2015, 02:46:25 am
My husband ran off with another woman and left me with 3 small children to raise.  I married again after they were grown and it lasted 1 year.  I have learned it is better to be by yourself than be mistreated and be unhappy.  Hope everyone has a good day and may God bless each of you and keep you safe. :)
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: lbeery on July 14, 2015, 07:43:34 am
I have been married for 39 years.  Wow, really? Yes, really.  It keeps getting better and better and I wouldn't have missed it for the world.  But, I would say that I might find it difficult if I was young again and just starting out.  I know that my life would have been drastically different if I had travelled the road as a single.  I would have taken different jobs and lived an entirely different life.  But the cowboy took me to places I never would have imagined going.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: ghunter on July 14, 2015, 08:27:10 am
I got married at age twenty-three and I guess at that time it was right for me.  I have been married now for 37 years (38 in September), have two wonderful children and five grandchildren.  We had our ups and down but every relationship does, but if you work at it what GOD have joined together, no one can tear it apart.  So it is really up to the individual.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: UGetPaid on July 14, 2015, 12:07:21 pm

Right and wrong has never changed. Only people's perceptions of it change to suit their own purposes.  :sad1:


Although I agree with pretty much everything that linderlizzie said, I think this is the key/core point summed up in one line.  I think the growing acceptance of moral relativism has done more to undermine and damage society than just about any other ideology.

The choice to live a married or single life is one thing, and choosing to live a single life is not a bad thing.  No one should be made to feel incomplete or a failure if they choose to live a single life and not get married.  But the choice to live together or to have children with one or more partners outside of marriage is not right in my opinion and belief system.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: dsawan on July 14, 2015, 01:05:08 pm
single, then again its a personal choice. however, its getting very ahrd financially to live the single life due to cost.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: teenangel on July 14, 2015, 04:46:51 pm
it your personal preference if you or anyone wants to get married or not
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: Penwoir on July 14, 2015, 05:02:32 pm
You raise some really good points. My brother in law is a house-dad, a really good one, and my sister goes out to work. She enjoys her job and is great at bringing home the bacon. My brother in law didn't like work as much so they mutually decided that he would be the housedad. He is great with the kids, is a super cook and supports my sister in her career. Gone are the days when recruiters see a blank 10 years on a man's resume and wonder what he was doing. It is now just as acceptable for a man to take a family break as it has been for women for the last few decades. As a planet, we have broadened our perspectives, which benefits everybody.
Title: Re: To Marry or Not To Marry
Post by: bremer51 on July 14, 2015, 06:45:27 pm
I'm with UGetPaid on this one.  "Times have changed" doesn't dictate what is right and what is wrong. In my mind, just because a behavior is allowed or tolerated or accepted or endorsed does not necessarily make it right.