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Discussion Boards => Off-Topic => Topic started by: batmobile on July 17, 2015, 10:14:08 pm
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What would you do if a friend borrowed something and never returned it? Is a messy home really an excuse?????
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I never lend anything to someone other than something that I never anticipate getting back and have no immediate need for precisely because of the way that you stated your question. People never return things. Humans rarely pay money back to friends. I once bought a duplex that my sister and I were living in and never let her know that I bought it. I watched as she scrambled to make rent every month for three years. I know that she would not have scrambled if she would have known that I was the owner. She was somewhat angry when she found out, after I had sold the duplex, that I was the owner but I did not suffer credit damage because I could not pay my mortgage due to her rent being late.
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If its money and you expect to get it repaid or it would be a problem if its not repaid then don't loan it. Period. That comes from someone who is 61 and has rarely IF ever gotten anything paid back. If it is an item meaningful to you that would mean a loss of a friendship or relationship if not returned DON'T LOAN it statistics say you can kiss it goodbye. I have found that I can do without what I don't have or find a way to take care of myself. And I have no problem saying no to requests for money or items. People find a way somehow if they are forced to and no a messy house isn't an excuse. That is just saying this person doesn't respect you or your kindness.
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One thing I've learned the hard way....
never loan something to a hoarder.
They won't return it without being nagged and I don't like to nag. :heart:
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If it's something you value or can't afford to replace, don't loan it.
I learned that lesson the hard way.
A friend borrowed my vacuum cleaner, which I had only used a few times.
It quit working on her, after having it and using it for a month, and she put it in her closet.
Instead of bringing it back to me, and telling me it broke, she kept mine put away and went out and bought herself a new one. Which is what she should have done in the first place.
And no, a messy house is no excuse.
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Request a cash deposit and no one will ever borrow from you again.
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Oh that's a shame. Firstly, if it was something I was expecting back and this friend couldn't find it, they would no longer be my friend! I'm afraid someone only loses my trust once, and when it's gone, it's gone! In future, don't lend anything you're not prepared to lose forever! You could do with surrounding yourself with genuine friends who don't ask for things. If they were a real friend, they would repay you for what they can't find.
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I make it a policy. Neither a lender or borrower be.
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I don't loan anything to anybody other than close family.
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i quit loaning even to family, because I was not getting my things back.
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My son and his girlfriend at the time needed their car painted and since my hubby and his son were doing body and fender repairs plus painting at the time, they asked them to do it. Hubby stated he would only charge for the paint and parts needed but the total still came to $1500 because it was a rare Chrysler color. They never paid. Needless to say, son and girlfriend are no longer together.
Hubby also used to loan construction supplies to people. He loaned 4 sections of scaffolding (10 feet high when expanded) to a friend for a job. It never came back and the friend is no longer a friend after denying that he had it. What he did was sell it when he was done with it. Good friend.
I made made a whole ham for a funeral dinner 30 years ago and put it on a stainless steel platter that mom said I could use because I didn't have a platter large enough.
It never came back even though she had her name inscribed on it. I asked a couple times and the person denied ever seeing it! We both loved that platter.
That was the last time hubby and I loaned anything to anyone. :(
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my daughter and I borrow things all the time from each other,,,,, and always seem to return the things with in the same week. My cousin next door to me has borrowed things and i have never gotten them back. from a french fry cutter to a rug shampooer. its been years and haven't seen them yet.
i don't let them borrow anything anymore :(
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I really don't like to lend out my things because from experience, I know that sometimes things get misplaced and you never see them again.
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If it's that valuable to me I wouldn't.
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I try not to loan things if I want someone to have something I will usually just give it to them, borrowing can lead to losing friendships.
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I've loaned out books that were never returned and clothes that were returned damaged. (And a tool that was given back broken without an offer to replace it.) There are some people I won't loan things to because they are careless even with their own things. If I know someone would really enjoy or could use something, I just give it to them.
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if a friend borrowed something and never paid it back easy answer i will never loan anything to that person again
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I don't mind loaning material things but I don't like loaning money or letting people loan me money. I don't want to have to stress about paying someone back or worrying if someone will pay me back. If it is an emergency situation or family I would rather just give what I can rather than a loan.