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Discussion Boards => Off-Topic => Topic started by: aggie49 on November 22, 2015, 03:44:41 pm

Title: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: aggie49 on November 22, 2015, 03:44:41 pm
i have been friends with this girl for over 20 years and today she just happend to say *bleep* to me that pissed me off to the point i wanted to beat the hell out of her but i was a bigger person and let my mouth do the talking i know she still will countine to *bleep* and complain about how she doesn't have this or that she doesn't like anything she complains she always alone so i told her she will always be alone if she does not stop complaining about everything or bitching all the time i told her she is the only one that can change her life and that there are people with a whole lot less and a whole lot less then she has but she won't listen or changing so i told her if she does not do something i will never talk to her again and we will not be friends no more i feel bad that i had to get nasty with her but i have had it she makes everything about her she does not seem to care about anything but her self do you think i am wrong  my husband and girls say no that they are shocked it took this long for me to blow up at her i just hope she open's her eyes before it is to late for her
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: kimber62372 on November 22, 2015, 04:07:27 pm
It's unfortunate that you lost a friend over something so petty, but there is no right or wrong. If the girl is self centered and thinks the world revolves around her then all you  had to do was walk  away with a smile and tell her when she is all grown up, she can come talk to you. But it sounds to me that you were holding pent up anger towards her for a while now and could not take it anymore. It was meant to be, everything happens for a reason. If you care for her, she will most likely come back to you and apologize first. Good luck and hope everything turns out okay for you. Many blessings to you and your family this holiday season! :)  :turkey: :present:
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: aflyingmonkey on November 22, 2015, 05:27:32 pm
You know that Mark Twain quote :
"Hang out with friends who are like-minded who are also designing purpose-filled lives. Similarly be that kind of a friend for your friends."

If you have friends that take more from you and cause a negative impact to your life, at some point you need to cut them loose, for your own well-being.  They are like dementors from Harry Potter, they suck all happiness out of you.
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: killers2 on November 22, 2015, 06:03:41 pm
i hope your situation is resolved.  If she is an important friend it will!
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: KarenWitty on November 22, 2015, 09:06:55 pm
I am  so sorry about this. I would probably treat your friends the way you want to be treated and if they treat you back respectively keep them as a friend. If not, maybe they weren't good friend material in the first place. I always tell my boys..... do what is right and if they are your true friends they will understand and work things out. I have some great friends and I hope you find some too
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: Penwoir on November 23, 2015, 06:06:31 am
That is a difficult situation but I agree with flying monkey. The problem with friends who are so negative is that it affects the people around them, which is you! I think, as a good friend, it is your duty to try to sympathize with them, however if the negativity gets overwhelming and you don't seem to be getting through, it is best for your own sanity that you cut out the dead wood or "prune" in order that you can continue to flourish.
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: autumnsparklemom on November 23, 2015, 06:30:10 am
If you have been friends with her for that long, maybe you two can sit down and work out the situation. Just sit and listen to her. Maybe she just needed to vent and have someone listen. Is it really worth ending ending a friendship over something silly? Life is to short to bicker.
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: Rahmanh on November 28, 2015, 05:09:02 pm
I think you are absolutely right. You did the right thing and your friend sound like a spoiled brat.
 
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: minioncookies on November 29, 2015, 08:06:10 am
Gl hopefully you resolve your situation maybe since its the holidays you two can find a common resolution
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: countrygirl12 on November 29, 2015, 12:26:19 pm
There is a lot left out and with out hearing her side of it then it is hard to say you are right or she is right.  It's hard to believe you were best friends for 20 years and one day she is complaining and you just go off and don't want to be friends any longer.  It sounds like there was something else  going on.  And if she has always complained (for 20 years) why would it not bother you for 20 years and all of a sudden bother you.

Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: fillfran82 on November 29, 2015, 10:38:45 pm
i have been friends with this girl for over 20 years and today she just happend to say *bleep* to me that pissed me off to the point i wanted to beat the hell out of her but i was a bigger person and let my mouth do the talking i know she still will countine to *bleep* and complain about how she doesn't have this or that she doesn't like anything she complains she always alone so i told her she will always be alone if she does not stop complaining about everything or bitching all the time i told her she is the only one that can change her life and that there are people with a whole lot less and a whole lot less then she has but she won't listen or changing so i told her if she does not do something i will never talk to her again and we will not be friends no more i feel bad that i had to get nasty with her but i have had it she makes everything about her she does not seem to care about anything but her self do you think i am wrong  my husband and girls say no that they are shocked it took this long for me to blow up at her i just hope she open's her eyes before it is to late for her

Hello there! :D :wave: I don't think you are wrong. :) You made some valid points :glasses-nerdy: :D! Hopefully she will open up her eyes and change. Friends are there to tell you when you step out of line. :bs: Which is exactly what you did! :) :highfive: She may had not see it that way. Perhaps you and her can have another talk and work things out! :D :)

I'm sure it will be fine! :D :wave:
Francesca,
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: moon29 on November 30, 2015, 03:35:49 am
sadly i have been in your position so many times.  im surprised that it took 2o years for you to end a toxic relationship with your friend.  friendship is a lot like marriage you each have to give and receive or it will never amount to anything.
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: Bigpar31 on November 30, 2015, 05:32:38 am
To have something you never had, you have to do something you never did.
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: bremer51 on November 30, 2015, 06:14:18 am
I have a couple friends that are rather difficult. I don't think they really know how negative they can be.  I stick with them however, because they don't have many (or any) other friends. And, on occasion they surprise me a thoughtful, selfless act of kindness.
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: champak97 on November 30, 2015, 06:51:05 pm
It is always good to end a toxic relationship. In the long run you will be fine.
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: cwillard1 on November 30, 2015, 07:26:36 pm
It is sad to have it end this way.  I know your hurting.  But you need to do what is best for you.
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: masked_brown_guy on November 30, 2015, 07:31:10 pm
pretty sure you'll work it out, you are friends after all. i was once told its our differences that attract us to one another and the similarities keep your bond.
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: tantricia44 on November 30, 2015, 10:38:11 pm
be careful, that maybe a cry for helpp! some peaple have a hard time asking for help!Don't toss out her out yet; she may really need u now!
Title: Re: had a blow up with a friend
Post by: plennis on November 30, 2015, 10:39:45 pm
After 20 years, I cannot believe you won't work it out.    One day could not kill a friendship of that long.