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Discussion Boards => Off-Topic => Debate & Discuss => Topic started by: hensleyll on March 29, 2014, 11:47:41 am
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my grandsons are 9 and 10 and they fight over everything ,drives me nutts ,will it always be like this dont remmeber my brothers fighting this bad
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I think they will grow out of fighting each other.
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Siblings fight. I grew up with not only my brother but 3 of my cousins pretty much living with us and we all fought. It's just one of those things
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I am the oldest of 5 children. We fought too. But we would have enough love to have each other's backs. Hopefully they will have each other's backs when one needs it. I recall my sister next to me (I am 55 and she is 50) kept me in trouble, but I loved her. :female: :female: :female: :male: :female: :heart: :heart:
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I am the oldest of four, and we fought a lot as kids. But when someone else picked on one of us, we fought back for them. Now that we are in our sixties and seventies, we are closer, except for my youngest sister. She became addicted to prescription drugs and has severe mood swings, sometimes explosive. It is hard to get close to her. My brother passed away a couple of years ago, and we were very much closer before he died. I am grateful for that.
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My brother and I faught as we grew up but not near as much as my 19 year old and 11 year old girls do. Drives me crazy as well. Hopefully with the 19 year old starting college in the fall( even though this first year she'll be attending a local college) things will be a little better. Right now we just have to get through high school graduation.
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It can be frustrating and upsetting to watch — and hear — your kids fight with one another. A household that's full of conflict is stressful for everyone. Yet often it's hard to know how to stop the fighting, and or even whether you should get involved at all. But you can take steps to promote peace in your household and help your kids get along.
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ihave tried time and again ,it just gets worse
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I have 6 kids and 5 are boys. I can tell you about some fighting lol I am praying that they will grow out of it, but it hasn't happened so far. lol
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I am the youngest of 9 and I am 50 years old. But back in the day my youngest brother and I fought more than anybody.
My children are 24 and 18 and thank God they have grown away from fighting. They use to drive me crazy. Girl 24 Boy 18.
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It drives me nutts how bad they fight
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My sisters and I had our share of fights as we were growing up, but when one of us got into a precarious situation the other was right there to defend and protect.
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All siblings fight. I've gotten quite a few scars over the years from fighting with mine. At the end of the day, though, most siblings would rush to protect each other. They'll grow out of it. Don't worry.
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I agree that all siblings fight. I was fighting aganist my sister for years when I was young. We were, like yours, fighting over almost everything small or big but now we are very close sisters.
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You are not alone in this. Most parents rank kids’ fighting with each other as the parenting issue that most bothers them, and that they feel least able to prevent.
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The truth is that it’s almost impossible to figure out who “started” a conflict, and which provocations led to which retaliations. If you take sides, you increase the resentments. Sometimes, one child was bullying another and was allowed to get away with it. But in my opinion every child has the right to be safe in his own home.
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I think that all kids need help learning social skills for handling conflict, which is an important part for them to grow up. But we can't expect them to know these skills if we don't teach them.The fact that the kids usually beg to play together when they're separated is your biggest asset in solving this challenge. Clearly they WANT to play together, they just get stuck in conflicts they don't know how to resolve. We need to teach them how.
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How to stop them fighting: 1.Stay Calm. Research shows that kids need to experience their parents as a "holding environment" -- a safe harbor in the storm of their turbulent feelings. If you can stay calm and soothe your children, they will eventually learn to stay calm themselves, which is the first step in learning to manage their feelings.
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2.Model civility. Say "The rule in our house is that we treat each other with kindness and respect. I hear screaming and hurting. That is not respectful, and it isn't allowed. Can you two work this out now, or do you need time to cool off?" this usually works well.
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3.Teach negotiation skills. The kids DO want to play together, they just don't know how to work out conflicts. Our job is to teach them. So if they aren't too upset, move right in and model conflict resolution. My mother used to do this a lot for me and my sister.
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So after going thru couple of months fist fighting they have mellowed quite a bit ,so much so my oldest broke his wrist in a fall at the busstop so his bro decided to make him feel better by putting on a brace
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They might fight each other but when it comes down to it, if they are in a situation where either one of them needed each other's help all that fighting will dissappear.They will take care of each other as family does and should do.
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YES I AM SI HAVE A FEELING MAYBE LOT OF FIGHTING IS BECAUSE EVERYTIME THERE PARENTS TRY TO TALK TO EACH OTHER THEY END UP SCREAMING AT EACHOTHER wHICH IS WHY THEY SPLIT UP TO BEGIN W ITH