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Discussion Boards => Off-Topic => Topic started by: cateyes1 on October 19, 2018, 03:51:29 am

Title: Smoking
Post by: cateyes1 on October 19, 2018, 03:51:29 am
I had a friend say that we all have to die sometime and she is tired of people telling her to quit. I told her all the reason TO quit but she got upset with me. I told her why would ANYONE want to die sooner than later from smoking and she keeps saying "i'm going to die anyways" what kind of logic is that? My husband was told to quit or he wouldn't make it to 55, he passed at 48 :(...I dont get how some people think sometimes...is it ME?
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: kimber62372 on October 19, 2018, 06:14:45 am
I have been smoke free for 12.5 years. I was a smoker for only 13 years of my life but I did it cold turkey. Show her pictures of her what her lungs will look like compared to a healthy set of lungs. Yes, we all have to die some day but does she want to suffer? I use to hate people telling me to quit also, she has to be willing and ready. I have coached people to quit and so far I have happy clients! :)
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: cateyes1 on October 19, 2018, 06:23:16 am
I have been smoke free for 12.5 years. I was a smoker for only 13 years of my life but I did it cold turkey. Show her pictures of her what her lungs will look like compared to a healthy set of lungs. Yes, we all have to die some day but does she want to suffer? I use to hate people telling me to quit also, she has to be willing and ready. I have coached people to quit and so far I have happy clients! :)


Good for you on quitting. I smoked for many years as well and quit cold turkey. YES is was hard but after the 3rd time I was so glad that I did. My Dad (God Bless him) had COPD from smoking and I saw his struggles on oxygen :( YET, he lived to be 90. My older brother passed also from smoking along with my husband. I have showed her all kinds of commercials about smoking and NOTHING fazes her. Oh well it's her life. I did say to her though "pardon me for caring"
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: Nancy5 on October 19, 2018, 06:24:14 am
i was a smoker, started at 16 to be in the (in crowd) at that time.  I quit in 1999.  I agree it's not easy quitting but you feel better,  you, your car, your clothing,  and your house don't stink of stale smoke anymore, there are very few places you can smoke anymore, and it does cause lung cancer.  I agree we all have to die, but that talk is plain stupid.  If you are faced with a life threatening disease you will grab at anything to stay alive.  You can talk all you want to her but it won't change her mind so I would stop trying.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: cateyes1 on October 19, 2018, 06:34:27 am
i was a smoker, started at 16 to be in the (in crowd) at that time.  I quit in 1999.  I agree it's not easy quitting but you feel better,  you, your car, your clothing,  and your house don't stink of stale smoke anymore, there are very few places you can smoke anymore, and it does cause lung cancer.  I agree we all have to die, but that talk is plain stupid.  If you are faced with a life threatening disease you will grab at anything to stay alive.  You can talk all you want to her but it won't change her mind so I would stop trying.

Hi Nancy, good for you on quitting as well. After she practically told me to F off, well I shut my mouth after that. I just don't get some peoples logic. When she is on oxygen she will wonder why. I question why wait till it gets to that point but it still falls on deaf ears grrrrrrrrrrrr
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: bshee58 on October 19, 2018, 07:16:43 am
People like that don't want to come to grips with their last days on earth, if they push it way back, then it won't touch them, reality will set in, sooner or later, their situation of smoking will eventually get the best of them, smoking for years and their lungs will turn, other vital organs will fail, to them they come up with " we all have to die from something",,,,, but you have a choice, you get no seconds when your health fails.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: cateyes1 on October 19, 2018, 07:22:27 am
People like that don't want to come to grips with their last days on earth, if they push it way back, then it won't touch them, reality will set in, sooner or later, their situation of smoking will eventually get the best of them, smoking for years and their lungs will turn, other vital organs will fail, to them they come up with " we all have to die from something",,,,, but you have a choice, you get no seconds when your health fails.

Exactly what I mean thank you you said that so well .
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: ghunter on October 19, 2018, 07:24:22 am
I used to smoke trying to be in the in crowd as well, but have been smoke free for 13.5 years and I tryto get my husband to stop but he won't.  I can only keep praying.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: cateyes1 on October 19, 2018, 07:31:49 am
I used to smoke trying to be in the in crowd as well, but have been smoke free for 13.5 years and I tryto get my husband to stop but he won't.  I can only keep praying.

Good for you on quitting. OMG I tried so hard to get my husband to stop, oh he did, when he was 6 feet under:(...I was so mad, one day I went to visit his grave and a family member left him a pack of his favorite cigarettes, was I livid...I mean to leave something like that that actually killed him UGH....my friend said that she dont believe that smoking can kill you. geeezzzzzzzzzz
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: dogsleash on October 19, 2018, 08:32:34 am
It's a drug were addicted and we know it's bad just dont want to here it
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: cateyes1 on October 19, 2018, 08:37:09 am
It's a drug were addicted and we know it's bad just dont want to here it


I understand how addicting it can be BUT, if it is slowly killing you wouldn't one want to stop before it's to late? I mean how about the ones you leave behind :(
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: countrygirl12 on October 19, 2018, 09:48:49 am
I had a friend say that we all have to die sometime and she is tired of people telling her to quit. I told her all the reason TO quit but she got upset with me. I told her why would ANYONE want to die sooner than later from smoking and she keeps saying "i'm going to die anyways" what kind of logic is that? My husband was told to quit or he wouldn't make it to 55, he passed at 48 :(...I dont get how some people think sometimes...is it ME?

Why would you argue with somebody about smoking. It is their life and their lungs. As long as they do not blow smoke in my face and are not drawing food stamps and welfare I don't care.  Well except for when they get cancer and then get free insurance. And I am so sick and too weak to go to the doc and can't afford it because I do not have ins but my taxes pay for dead beats to have it.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: pectacon on October 19, 2018, 10:43:14 am
I don't get why anyone would smoke, even besides the health issues. It stinks and it's got to be so expensive.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: mapiklfish on October 19, 2018, 11:55:22 am
I have been smoke free for 12.5 years. I was a smoker for only 13 years of my life but I did it cold turkey. Show her pictures of her what her lungs will look like compared to a healthy set of lungs. Yes, we all have to die some day but does she want to suffer? I use to hate people telling me to quit also, she has to be willing and ready. I have coached people to quit and so far I have happy clients! :)

Pictures won't matter.  I'm sure she's seen them.  I used to say that too.  I did finally quit after about 20 years of smoking.
She isn't going to quit unless SHE wants to quit.  No amount of nagging is going to do it.  In fact, nagging will probably maker her more determined not to quit.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: vickysue on October 19, 2018, 03:09:22 pm
I will admit I am a smoker. Have tried to quit a few times, but never quite  made it.  Not a heavy one, but do enjoy one at times. But I  have been through a lot and sometimes the  smoking will settle me down. And when some  ones really starts raging me I just tell the them when they have walked in my shoes and or when they have to buy my  cigs. then they can complain.
we don't smoke in the house or anyone else's. We also don't smoke  in anyone's car or around  children. But other then  that  it is our business when we smoke.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: timvolley on October 19, 2018, 03:35:43 pm
we all have bad habits and if you want to stop doing them great and as a friend you can offer adivice but nobody is forced to take it. At least you tried.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: potluck6 on October 19, 2018, 09:17:48 pm
im a light smoker about 7 a day trying to do less. I think id be a nervous wreck. my aunt smoked till she was 74 I think and lived till 83. its my denial story.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: paints on October 19, 2018, 09:38:19 pm
I smoke.  Less than I used to, but I do still smoke.  It doesn't help to have someone tell me I should quit.  I'm a adult, and can choose for myself. 
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: Mizzkizz7 on October 19, 2018, 10:04:05 pm
To each their own. If a smoker decides to stop, then good. If not hopefully one day they can find the courage and strength to quit. My husband smokes but he has cut down a lot. However, he still smokes.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: camellia0 on October 20, 2018, 03:28:30 am
It's not just smoking. A person can do drugs, starve themselves, overeat, the list goes on. I think that it takes a serious health condition to come about before they wake up. You said what you needed to say, so it is up to them as to whether they take action
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: cateyes1 on October 20, 2018, 03:46:08 am
I had a friend say that we all have to die sometime and she is tired of people telling her to quit. I told her all the reason TO quit but she got upset with me. I told her why would ANYONE want to die sooner than later from smoking and she keeps saying "i'm going to die anyways" what kind of logic is that? My husband was told to quit or he wouldn't make it to 55, he passed at 48 :(...I dont get how some people think sometimes...is it ME?

Why would you argue with somebody about smoking. It is their life and their lungs. As long as they do not blow smoke in my face and are not drawing food stamps and welfare I don't care.  Well except for when they get cancer and then get free insurance. And I am so sick and too weak to go to the doc and can't afford it because I do not have ins but my taxes pay for dead beats to have it.

I wasn't arguing she was. I know that it's none of my business but I was showing concern after seeing what my Dad, brother and husband went through but she didn't want to hear it so I zipped it.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: darkxtsuna on October 20, 2018, 04:28:04 am
I have multiple friends and ex-friends that are like that and to tell you the truth man just give up on them if they are family then by all means do your best to get them to quit. Some of friends that smoke are basically dead beats who ask their family for money for packs. Just give up (.) period! The amount of time and effort I tried to make them stop was pointless, Just move on and let them die early I know its sad to think about and such but they are stubborn beyond no return. That's just my experience with smokers that are friends, I myself smoke from time to time but only on stressful days or depression I hardly go through a pack within 2 months or so. (I'm Just saying okay)-(Does not mean ohh hey okay I'll just give up on her) Anyways Best of luck if you wont give up on her and props mate for trying.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: bremer51 on October 20, 2018, 07:46:40 am
I used to be an occasional smoker.  Then I became a regular smoker.  Then I quit. Then became an occasional smoker again.  Then a regular smoker again.  I quit again and so far so good.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: cateyes1 on October 20, 2018, 07:50:14 am
I used to be an occasional smoker.  Then I became a regular smoker.  Then I quit. Then became an occasional smoker again.  Then a regular smoker again.  I quit again and so far so good.

You can do it !!
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: countrygirl12 on October 20, 2018, 08:11:30 am
It's not just smoking. A person can do drugs, starve themselves, overeat, the list goes on. I think that it takes a serious health condition to come about before they wake up. You said what you needed to say, so it is up to them as to whether they take action


Not really. I use to have a friend who has emphysema and he still smokes. He says when it gets bad enough he can get portable oxygen and he can draw disability so he is good.

The woman he lives with (who actually has a husband somewhere else lol) had breast cancer and she continued to smoke thru it all and still smokes.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: countrygirl12 on October 20, 2018, 08:13:18 am
I had a friend say that we all have to die sometime and she is tired of people telling her to quit. I told her all the reason TO quit but she got upset with me. I told her why would ANYONE want to die sooner than later from smoking and she keeps saying "i'm going to die anyways" what kind of logic is that? My husband was told to quit or he wouldn't make it to 55, he passed at 48 :(...I dont get how some people think sometimes...is it ME?

Why would you argue with somebody about smoking. It is their life and their lungs. As long as they do not blow smoke in my face and are not drawing food stamps and welfare I don't care.  Well except for when they get cancer and then get free insurance. And I am so sick and too weak to go to the doc and can't afford it because I do not have ins but my taxes pay for dead beats to have it.

I wasn't arguing she was. I know that it's none of my business but I was showing concern after seeing what my Dad, brother and husband went through but she didn't want to hear it so I zipped it.

I understand that. But if she doesn't want to hear it I wouldn't press it.  I would be like I was with my "friend".  Whatever. Except my taxes are paying for their treatments. smh. You can't make anybody do anything and like somebody else said a lot of times it will make them do it more. You can say you do not want her to do it around you.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: hkckk5 on October 20, 2018, 11:06:23 am
Your friends logic makes no sense. I am sure she is aware that your husbands life was cut short by smoking. Oh well all you can do is try. Its up to her to quit. Guess she just does not care about living longer.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: myfreebees316 on October 20, 2018, 01:34:07 pm
Only way for a smoker to quit is something they have to want to accomplish no other way will really work long term
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: shawnix on October 22, 2018, 07:44:39 pm
I'm not a smoker, but I've been in your position and learned that some people simply have to figure it out for themselves. The info about the dangers of smoking is everywhere, but sadly some don't care
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: bremer51 on October 22, 2018, 08:56:43 pm
Dying may not be the worst thing, but dying of lung cancer is a difficult way to go.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: cateyes1 on October 23, 2018, 04:52:05 am
I will admit I am a smoker. Have tried to quit a few times, but never quite  made it.  Not a heavy one, but do enjoy one at times. But I  have been through a lot and sometimes the  smoking will settle me down. And when some  ones really starts raging me I just tell the them when they have walked in my shoes and or when they have to buy my  cigs. then they can complain.
we don't smoke in the house or anyone else's. We also don't smoke  in anyone's car or around  children. But other then  that  it is our business when we smoke.

I gave up on "nagging" with her. She's been smoking for 50 years so she knows what's ahead in time (God forbid)
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: gaylasue on October 23, 2018, 07:28:07 am
I smoked on and off since I was 16.  I quit for several years and started back up.  I am now 4 months, 25 days smoke free...
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: cateyes1 on October 23, 2018, 08:45:38 am
I smoked on and off since I was 16.  I quit for several years and started back up.  I am now 4 months, 25 days smoke free...


Good for you, keep it up on NOT smoking you can do it !!!
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: squirrelgirl44 on October 23, 2018, 01:30:01 pm
I smoked when I was younger. Quit 11 years ago, will never have another one. My sister still smokes (has been for nearly 30 years now) and she says the same thing.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: dwiley11 on October 23, 2018, 03:48:40 pm
I stopped a few years ago and haven't looked back
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: mgint on October 25, 2018, 05:30:23 am
saw several relatives and friends die from lung cancer so if you smoke try to quit anyway possible.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: elvisdo on October 25, 2018, 06:04:26 am
I know people who smoke because they say it curbs their appetite and they lose weight despite how bad it is for them. As sad as it is, it is their life no matter what you try to do to convince them to quit.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: 1imaginarygirl on October 25, 2018, 06:44:06 am
It's nice of you to try and help, but you can't make people change their bad habits. I've never smoked, but it amazes me how many people still do despite knowing how bad it is for you. It must be worth the risk to them, I guess.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: bigfoot951 on November 07, 2018, 06:23:53 pm
It's retarded logic without a doubt.  But what if I kept telling you that something you are doing is killing you and you should stop?  I can promise you that pretty much everyone on here, including you, do something that causes cancer just as much as smoking.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: holmesch22 on November 07, 2018, 07:32:22 pm
Smoking is not for me but I can not complain about others
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: nannycoe1 on November 08, 2018, 04:34:47 am
It is an addiction. I smoke, I have quit several times but I always start back. It is harder when you live with someone else who also smokes
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: Skyisbluetoday on November 08, 2018, 04:46:09 am
   :turkey:   :snowman:   :turkey:  Most people know what smoking does for their health, but its an addiction that they must have. For us non smokers we don't see a reason for this. They choose to quit when they get ready, and some don't.  :turkey:   :snowman:   :turkey:
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: DEBMZ6 on November 08, 2018, 04:13:57 pm
I've never had the urge to smoke, thank goodness since I couldn't afford it. I read online that there are 1.1 billion smokers in the world today and if the trend continues,that number is expected to increase to 1.6 billion by the year 2025! Fact...tobacco kills more than six million people each year, which means that one smoking related death every five seconds!
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: mardukblood2009 on November 08, 2018, 04:25:52 pm
I quit in 2001. I smoked for about 10 years. You have to have a really really really good reason to be able to quit other wise you will not be able too. Telling someone too quit will never work.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: annadote on November 08, 2018, 08:04:18 pm
As a non-smoker, I don't see the logic of her statement. But as someone who knows some people that smoke, I would advise against pushing her further on the issue. She knows the risks and seems to believe that they are worth it. Plus she won't quit until she decides to do so. Your insistence on reminding her of the dangers might actually be encouraging her to keep smoking, if just out of spite.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: vg7405 on November 09, 2018, 03:54:18 am
To the OP: In a "no win" situation such as that, the only thing you can say is "To each his own." I know this was not your intention; I am only speaking in general terms. You cannot force someone to change their behavior; they have to want to change. If this is her logic, it is extremely flawed (and concerning). Just let her be, move on with your life, and focus on things that you have some control over.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: sbenkoski on November 09, 2018, 05:25:05 am
I quit smoking after 2 packs a day for 40 years,  and none of the people telling me to quit helped,  REALLY i knew it was bad for me .....  people need to understand  tell some one to quit DON'T  help!  I just makes us mad.  i quit because i wanted to not because  "someone else "  wanted me to.   I also understand ,  my  friends can smoke at my place and in my truck with the window cracked ,  I'll never run people down for something i had a hard time with myself.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: nmbrown863 on November 09, 2018, 04:46:21 pm
I finally quit after almost 16 years! My husband keeps saying he is going to quit but hasn't just yet! I am hoping he does! It was a process for me. I cut down tremendously before I was finally able to completely quit. I still crave one here and there but the feeling passes after a few minutes.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: cateyes1 on November 10, 2018, 05:03:20 am
For all of you who still smoke, just QUIT, you can do it !!
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: JaniceSW on December 04, 2018, 01:56:13 pm
People do only what they want to do.  This person doesn't want to face facts because then she will actually have to do something about it.  She is possibly in denial, thinking it will never happen to her!  You've done what you can. Just don't let her smoke in your home or car.  Second-hand smoke is about as dangerous to your health as actually smoking.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: mrisha on December 04, 2018, 07:11:02 pm
People choose how they want to live, be it smoking, drugs or alcohol.  I tried talking to a sibling years ago about cutting back on alcohol and smoking,  She became angry and stopped talking to me for a while.  We talk sometimes but not often.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: nannycoe1 on December 05, 2018, 05:05:44 am
It's a drug were addicted and we know it's bad just dont want to here it
I agree it is an addiction I have tryed many times and have succeeded a few times but always start back. My husband smokes and it is hard to live with someone who does it and quit.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: alice44 on December 05, 2018, 05:52:59 am
No - it's not just you!  Some people are not able to make the change so find an excuse to justify what they are doing.   :confused1:
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: Tresbn00 on December 05, 2018, 06:36:22 am
Some people live long happy lives even if they are smokers. There are people that have exceeded one hundred years in age with a daily regimen of a shot of booze followed by a cigarette. My grand mother lived to the ripe old age of ninety four smoking at least a pack of non filtered cigarettes a day. I have a seventy eight year old uncle that has smoked marijuana almost every day of his life since he was fifteen-researchers have indicated that marijuana has at least ten times the carcinogens found in cigarettes. My wife works out every day, doesn't smoke, eats healthy (all organic produce, minimal animal based protein, no junk food) had cancer for two years. I don't smoke and I try not to pass judgement. Who are we to judge others for indulging their pleasures if they are not hurting any one else? I think that if someone states that they don't care if smoking shortens their life it may be nothing more than a response to get judgmental people to leave. I wouldn't be surprised to see research indicating that exposure to judgement and negativity leads to a higher percentage of cancer deaths than smoking.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: PGS28 on December 05, 2018, 06:46:01 am
It sounds like she doesn't think she has the will to quit, either that or she's naive about the effects to smoking on her health. 
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: gaby_ro_2004 on December 05, 2018, 07:58:37 am
I tried to smoke when i was a teenager just to be fancy but i didn't like it.So....no smoking for me.
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: mrsmere on December 05, 2018, 10:30:44 am
I have never smoked but heard it's the hardest habit to stop.  I don't understand how people are in the hospital for three weeks or more without smoking get out and start back.  My niece did this and she couldn't explain it to me either. 
Title: Re: Smoking
Post by: brian8713 on December 05, 2018, 10:40:57 am
To be honest, I don't really object to her logic. We all have to go sooner or later. I'm sorry your husband passed at 48, but my uncle wasn't a smoker and he passed at 53 from cancer. His mother lived to 101! When you see a fat person eating fast food, you don't publicly chastise them for their obesity, so why is it okay to bully smokers? I'm not a smoker and frankly don't like being around them either, but I don't feel like it's my place to tell them whether or not they should smoke.