Falconer02:
If you're more comfortable being at the "end of the ropes" and calling it quits because "all human resources" have failed, then that's your option. When that happens to me, I CAN'T call it quits because I know my God is ALWAYS there for me. That's my option. I can respect you enough to let you live with your choices. I would hope for the same from you.
I'm not sure why you always jump right to "faith healers" when the topic of medicine comes up. There ARE doctors that attend medical school that are Christians (along with most every other profession!). They combine what they've learned about medicine along with prayer. They more than likely are at work in EVERY hospital. They don't do the "faith healing", they aren't called for that. Their calling is to work in the hospital as a doctor.
Re: "spiritual blindness". If' it's a term that you find upsetting, I really apologize. I used it because I can get up in the morning, listen to the news and see how world events LINE UP with what is in my Bible. I don't have to make excuses or live in denial because there is something going on or some new finding that proves my God does not exist and is not who He says He is. To me, that is seeing life wholly. If you can say the same and be honest about it...well, I'm sorry but I don't see how you can. I've been on the path that you currently are on and I know how that feels and what it takes to "not believe in God". It's not a good path no matter how good a person is at living in denial.
I know my God exists, I have no doubts. I'm not the kind of person that goes around trying to convert everyone I meet and I regret that. I have had more than one aquaintance or friend die young and unexpectedly. Their deaths angered me because I never took a moment to tell them what I knew about God and how they needed Him., now it's forever too late for them. They probably would have rejected what I told them anyway but that wasn't my call to make. Our paths crossed and I never told them what I knew and now it's too late for them. Facloner02, our paths have "crossed", I have told you what I know. It's not yet too late for you. In my honest opinion, even though you've said you've tried church before...I think you should pray directly to God. I think you should tell Him what's been going on with you and what you would like Him to do to reach you so that you have no questions left about whether or not He exists. Why? Because time is ticking and eventually it runs out for everyone.