Shopping at Walmart

[ben50]

now that everyone has new ideas, ha thanks can't quit laughing this morning

[Phx0808]

When I went shopping at Walmart, I was actually looking for these guys! I watched over the condom section like a hawk.

[ljrjess69]

 do alot of shopping at walmart,,,

[mill8277]

I love this little story.....I'm sure it's not real....I was behind an older truck one day after work and we stopped at the red light and I read his bumper sticker and it read.....when I die bury me next to Wal-mart maybe my wife will visit me.......

[potluck6]

Think i'd like to be banned from walmart.It is always so crowded ,went there a couple days ago and there were 3kids running up and down the isles don't know where the mom was.

[stepster23]

This little story made me smile.   

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Walmart. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Walmart

Dear Mrs. Woolf,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Woolf, are listed below and are "documented by our video surveillance cameras":

1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-
minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the
women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official
voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the
employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted in management getting involved causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to reserve a bag of
chips.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the
children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and
blankets from the bedding department - to which twenty children
obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began
crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
Emergency Medics were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the Sports department, he
asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly
humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed
through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!

15. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where the fitting room was.

And last, but not least:

16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited
awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in
here.' One of the Staff passed out.

I wonder if I'll have to go along on many more shopping trips?

LOL now this was the funniest thing i have read in a very long time if this stuff is true hats off to this guy hahahaha because i have never heard of such things this guy is hilarious he needs to get an award for so much effort to get out of going shopping 

[tbosworth1]

Too funny....Thanks for sharing!  I have already shared it as well.    

[o2bnocn]

That is a very funny story. That guy has a sense of humor. 

[Marie6744]

They need to keep their shelves fully stock with products, have prices on shelves, and expand their narrow aisles wider so the aisles won't be so tight for shoppers to shop.

  I couldn't agree more some of the aisles can only fit one carriage at a time so one of the shoppers has to back up to let the other one through.

[ilovepatrick]

 :notworthy:this makes me feel so good because my spouse hates to shop and often makes a scene my first husband would lay on the floor and kick and scream like a three year old but he was sick and i made allowances for that. my current husband has no excuse he is just grumpy

[reiddb]

That was ridiculous....probably not true, huh? ; )  Funny~

[dodgers16]

  I love to do my shopping at Walmart!!  it is so nice to have everything that you might need all under the same roof!!  anything from veggetables to tv's 

[vicogden]

Love it!

[cowgirl2116]

Oh, the answer is YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Otherwise, you may have the suffer the same consequences as your so-called "bored" husband.  You have already received one of those consequences---banned from your local Wal-mart.

[Phx0808]

Is it true? Of course it isn't true. You woulld have to be..... to think .... I mean it's a cute story but not true. Yeah, that's it... LOL