This topic is locked, no replies allowed. Inaccurate or out-of-date info may be present.

  • Print

Topic: What do I do?  (Read 2590 times)

cateyes1

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 5563 (since 2009)
  • Thanked: 193x
What do I do?
« on: January 20, 2019, 05:09:28 am »
A few people have dropped out of my life because I tend to speak what is on my mind. Or they take what I say in the way I didn't mean it to come out. I hate walking on egg shells while talking to people, but what am I to do? hence why I don't go out as much anymore, some people are to touchy for me and so I try to avoid some :( my daughter had mentioned that I make people hate me UGH :'(

countrygirl12

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 12568 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 435x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #1 on: January 20, 2019, 10:38:55 am »
Keep living the way you do and go on. I can say the EXACT same thing as someone else and people get mad at me and not at someone else when we said the same thing.  Then it's oh well it's the way you said it.  No, you are a snowflake. lol

I speak my mind as well.  If people get mad - then they get mad.  I don't agree with everything I hear other people say but I go on with life.

You are correct.  People are too touchy.  Everybody is offended by everything.  And over the past couple years they have learned that being "offended" and squawking gets them attention.

I remember YEARS ago I was working with a girl who was close to 300 pounds.  We were at Burger King and she had the gall to ask me if she was fat.  Uhhhhh.  I finally said well I won't say you are fat but it wouldn't hurt you to lose a few pounds.  She goes back to work and tells everyone that I said she needed to lose weight.  So everyone gets mad at me.  She didn't bother to tell them SHE ASKED ME if she was fat.  And when you are 300 plus pounds you are fat and you do not need to ask somebody.  Did she want me to tell her no?  lol  It's not like I just walked up to her and said hey you are a fat@ss and you need to lose weight.

These days people are just looking for a reason to cry and be offended.  I wouldn't worry about it.

cateyes1

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 5563 (since 2009)
  • Thanked: 193x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #2 on: January 20, 2019, 10:56:30 am »
Keep living the way you do and go on. I can say the EXACT same thing as someone else and people get mad at me and not at someone else when we said the same thing.  Then it's oh well it's the way you said it.  No, you are a snowflake. lol

I speak my mind as well.  If people get mad - then they get mad.  I don't agree with everything I hear other people say but I go on with life.

You are correct.  People are too touchy.  Everybody is offended by everything.  And over the past couple years they have learned that being "offended" and squawking gets them attention.

I remember YEARS ago I was working with a girl who was close to 300 pounds.  We were at Burger King and she had the gall to ask me if she was fat.  Uhhhhh.  I finally said well I won't say you are fat but it wouldn't hurt you to lose a few pounds.  She goes back to work and tells everyone that I said she needed to lose weight.  So everyone gets mad at me.  She didn't bother to tell them SHE ASKED ME if she was fat.  And when you are 300 plus pounds you are fat and you do not need to ask somebody.  Did she want me to tell her no?  lol  It's not like I just walked up to her and said hey you are a fat@ss and you need to lose weight.

These days people are just looking for a reason to cry and be offended.  I wouldn't worry about it.

Dont you hate when people conveniently leave leave out things. Such as she asked you if you thought she was fat. I hope you mentioned that to whom ever got mad at you hun.

countrygirl12

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 12568 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 435x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #3 on: January 20, 2019, 11:26:53 am »
Keep living the way you do and go on. I can say the EXACT same thing as someone else and people get mad at me and not at someone else when we said the same thing.  Then it's oh well it's the way you said it.  No, you are a snowflake. lol

I speak my mind as well.  If people get mad - then they get mad.  I don't agree with everything I hear other people say but I go on with life.

You are correct.  People are too touchy.  Everybody is offended by everything.  And over the past couple years they have learned that being "offended" and squawking gets them attention.

I remember YEARS ago I was working with a girl who was close to 300 pounds.  We were at Burger King and she had the gall to ask me if she was fat.  Uhhhhh.  I finally said well I won't say you are fat but it wouldn't hurt you to lose a few pounds.  She goes back to work and tells everyone that I said she needed to lose weight.  So everyone gets mad at me.  She didn't bother to tell them SHE ASKED ME if she was fat.  And when you are 300 plus pounds you are fat and you do not need to ask somebody.  Did she want me to tell her no?  lol  It's not like I just walked up to her and said hey you are a fat@ss and you need to lose weight.

These days people are just looking for a reason to cry and be offended.  I wouldn't worry about it.

Dont you hate when people conveniently leave leave out things. Such as she asked you if you thought she was fat. I hope you mentioned that to whom ever got mad at you hun.

I don't remember.  It was a long time ago.  I think I did mention the whole conversation.  People are good at leaving out small details.  She asked for my opinion.  I could never just walk up and tell somebody you are fat. But if you are that over weight you know the answer. Does me telling you nah you aren't fat make you weigh less?  Today I would probably just smile and say "I am not even going there" lol

bremer51

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 3220 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 138x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #4 on: January 20, 2019, 11:54:35 am »
If you are losing your people, you may need to compromise.  Speak your mind, by all means, but remember your choice of words can build up or they can destroy.

countrygirl12

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 12568 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 435x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #5 on: January 20, 2019, 12:48:41 pm »
If you are losing your people, you may need to compromise.  Speak your mind, by all means, but remember your choice of words can build up or they can destroy.

I don't and I don't think cateyes1 is trying to destroy anyone.  I speak my mind, like she said she does. People may not agree with my opinion but that is how it is.  There are a lot of things in the world today that people disagree on.  You can talk to me and have a different opinion and "I" can go on with my day and not hate you because we do not agree.  Some people can not do that.  Some people if they do not agree with you get mad and won't speak to you.

As far as giving my opinion on people's hair, clothes, or whatever I do not do that unless specifically asked.  And sometimes I will lie just to end the conversation.  It is like a young girl in a fast food place who had shaved he head and died the remains pink.  She ask what I thought and I lied to her.  I didn't tell her ya look like a goofball. lol I don't care.  It is not my head.

I don't think cateyes was saying she just says things to hurt people.  She just speaks her opinion and people who don't agree may get mad. 

singletonb

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 2676 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 79x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #6 on: January 20, 2019, 08:30:50 pm »
I think that you need to figure out what it will take to make you happy.  It sounds like (to me) you are not happy with the way you are received by others.  How would you feel if someone said to you what you are saying to others or the way you say it.
*Image Removed*

cateyes1

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 5563 (since 2009)
  • Thanked: 193x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #7 on: January 21, 2019, 03:30:35 am »
I think that you need to figure out what it will take to make you happy.  It sounds like (to me) you are not happy with the way you are received by others.  How would you feel if someone said to you what you are saying to others or the way you say it.

I am not saying anything bad though that is just it. My messages/emails get miss understood. Instead of letting me explain myself some get mad.

madeara

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 3143 (since 2008)
  • Thanked: 104x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #8 on: January 21, 2019, 01:15:03 pm »
Be yourself.  However, can you say the same things in a way that is kinder and more gentle?
*Image Removed*

timvolley

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 3680 (since 2008)
  • Thanked: 52x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #9 on: January 21, 2019, 01:26:25 pm »
I agree maybe there is an easier way to tell people how you feel without hurting their feelings. IF they are good friends and you are trying to help them they should understand .

tnshpalmer85

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Silver Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 1302 (since 2016)
  • Thanked: 31x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #10 on: January 22, 2019, 04:29:28 pm »
I don't know the situation, but maybe you can think before you speak sometimes because sometimes things come out the wrong way when you just say what is on the top of your head. Sometimes it can be your tone or body language that give the wrong signal. I also believe that if someone is a close friend or family member you should be able to be yourself at the end of the day.

countrygirl12

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 12568 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 435x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #11 on: January 23, 2019, 06:33:27 am »
I don't know the situation, but maybe you can think before you speak sometimes because sometimes things come out the wrong way when you just say what is on the top of your head. Sometimes it can be your tone or body language that give the wrong signal. I also believe that if someone is a close friend or family member you should be able to be yourself at the end of the day.

You cannot really change the sound of your voice.  You should be yourself no matter who you are dealing with.  I said something yesterday at McDonald's that I am sure was taken the wrong way.  And I guess it would have been better if I had not said it out loud. lol.  I didn't mean it in a bad way (just ask a question that was in response to something that was said to me) but I guarantee if it can have a spin put on it to make it something bad it will have.  People love to be offended.

I recently had someone I worked for tell me my face didn't match my words.  REALLY!!!  Well neither does yours....because you smile and act all sweet when in reality you are a total bieotch.  You may act sweet but I see what you really are.

I recently met a woman who is smiling ALL the time.  I have never seen anyone who can smile constantly with every word they say.  But this woman does.  She is an exception.  Most people are not like that.  You also do not know what people are dealing with in their private lives.  Like I already said I have seen more than once where 2 people can say the exact same thing and others get mad at the one and say the other is correct.  THEY SAID THE SAME THING!

dsawan

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 4782 (since 2011)
  • Thanked: 46x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #12 on: January 23, 2019, 07:33:40 am »
Do what you think is best and move on.

ghunter

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 4199 (since 2010)
  • Thanked: 165x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #13 on: January 23, 2019, 08:23:26 am »
Just watch what you say to those people who take it the wrong way.  I too said what is on my mind and everyone that knows me know that I mean no harm to them, I am just speaking the truth.

Mizzkizz7

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Silver Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 1645 (since 2017)
  • Thanked: 67x
Re: What do I do?
« Reply #14 on: January 23, 2019, 06:01:43 pm »
A few people have dropped out of my life because I tend to speak what is on my mind. Or they take what I say in the way I didn't mean it to come out. I hate walking on egg shells while talking to people, but what am I to do? hence why I don't go out as much anymore, some people are to touchy for me and so I try to avoid some :( my daughter had mentioned that I make people hate me UGH :'(

I just don't say anything at all, but If you say something, say it in a way that wouldn't offend the person or people. Everyone isn't the same as you. Some or sensitive so you have to know how to navigate around those type of ppl.
Beautifulone1

  • Print