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Discussion Boards => Suggestions => Topic started by: samrhett2 on March 09, 2012, 05:25:10 am
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I put parents in quotations because you really can't call some people parents, they are more like breeders.
My son who is 12 came home with tears in his eyes yesterday. He is friends with a little boy at school that I had heard was newly adopted. He said his friend told him that the adopted parents decided they didn't want him so he was going back into foster care ad he did not know if he would ever be back at that school. He was previously in foster care because he said his mom didn't want him.
My heart is broken. What is wrong with people? Can you imagine being 12 and not knowing where you were going from one day to the next and who you would have to live with and take instructions from? That has to be terrifying.
I thought of my friend and fellow FC member Cathy. She has opened her home to foster children and does a fantastic job. I wish I could do something for this boy, but I know it take time to get approved to be a foster parent and I don't think you get to choose the child that stays with you anyway.
I had a child when I wasn't married. It was not planned and I could not really afford it, but we are a loving family, just he and I, and I would give my life for him. Would my life have been easier without him? Sure, but I could never have lived with myself. He is the joy of my life and I would do anything for him. Don't know why some people can throw kids away like trash.
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some people should never have children...not everyone is meant to be a parent. and, babies dont come with an instruction booklet attached to their foot, and unfortunatly for the baby, we have to learn as we go along. i've been az much better grandparent then i ever was at being a parent. some cant physically or mentally care for their kids, and they end up in foster care or with relatives, hopefully the little guy grows up to be a good person even with what he's going through
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I understand the need to put parents in quotations and I agree with you. The only thing I can think of that may go through the minds for foster/adoptive parents (and this is NOT an excuse) is that they do not feel obligated to love and support the child. Parenting is tough. I have 2 kids and I know there are times that no matter how much you love them, you just want to walk out the door. But you don't because they are a part of you and you need them as much or more than they need you. These people apparently didn't feel that way.
I don't get it either. It's sad and I'm sorry your son is going through this too.
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This is a sad but oft-repeated story. I blame our society as much as the 'parents'. Everything is disposable. We have lost our moral compass and some never had one. The victims are always the defenseless children.
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I agree the moral compass in society today is spinning out of control. Everyone uses thier story as an excuse instead of a place to start growing and learning how to be better. Life is hard when you have love and the right information....imagine how it is compounded without those things. Hopefully we can come together as a society and do the right thing. Children are our future.......we should be investing in them......
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I agree we all go threw things I guess some people are just stronger than others.
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Usually parents who adopt a child really want to have children and can't for some reason, and the adoption process is a long and grueling one. I can't imagine any parent adopt a child and just decide they didn't want that child anymore. That is really sad.
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I understand. I have a sister she has 3 kids all by different dads. She did nt want the stress or to be responsible for them. so they went to state. Im only sister I have no say.. Miss you guys.
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It's hard to understand how people can be like that. You agree one minute to take In a child who Is abandoned then decide oh we don't want him now... In my personal opinion, some females as well as males should be born without the ability to have children. I myself have a 2 year old and sure I got pregnant at a weird time ( My boyfriend and I had not been together long when we found out we were expecting ) BUT I could never give my daughter up.
I admit, when I first got pregnant I was happy yes but also scared because as someone said, babies do not come with an Instruction manual. Yes, It's a hard job and some are cut out for It while others should just be slapped senseless for having a child they do not Intend on raising. This Is one of the biggest problems In this messed up world. Too many females have kids then decide they don't want them. It would tear me up Inside knowing someone else was raising my child.
Now on another note, lets say a teenager gets pregnant and has no support at all. I could then understand adoption. I've got a few friends who had a baby at a young age but they decided they had made an adult decision so they needed to take care of their baby themselves. Another big Issue Is drugs. You see It everyday, a woman addicted to drugs has a baby then abandons him/her. I really wish this world were better. I hate that my daughter Is going to grow up In such a messed up world.
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I understand your frustration I was abandoned by my birth mother at a very young age only to be adopted by an abusive alcoholic mother who had no idea what she was doing so much to point that I was just shuffled around to her friends who cared and then when me and my siblings became to much we moved to another person.Its a hard life but with people around who are loving and supportive and stable(regardless of race,religion,or sexual orientation)a child can grow up relatively normal with a few rough edges and a need for therapy
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I believe, that when you adopt a kid you're making a decision to be the child's parent. People who have children biologically sometimes don't get to decide it just happens by accident, ( so to speak). How dare you adopt a child and then give it back! Shame on them, you don't even give away your pets let alone your children.
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Oh wow, that just breaks my heart. I know I had my first child sort of young, and I just had my 2nd one. I might not have been totally ready when I had my first one, and sometimes it can get stressful taking care of more than one, but I could never just give them up like that. They are my everything.... I just hope things will work out ok for that young boy.
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That is so sad. I can't even imagine such a thing.
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It's a sick world.
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As of yesterday, the child is still at my son's school. My son did not ask him where he is staying. I contacted DSS and asked if there is anything I can do or if our phone number can at least be given to the foster parents where he ends up so that my son can stay in contact with him or that maybe we can have him over once in awhile. DSS, said they would be back in touch with me this week, but so far I have not heard anything. Yesterday the boy asked my son to have me contact DSS. That was interesting because I already had. I am not sure why he told my son that and he was not clear on it either. I don't want to prompt him to ask the child a bunch of personal information because he is probably already dealing with a lot, but I am very worried about the situation.
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I salute you for your caring for this child. Your own child is fortunate to have you for a mother. There are different kinds of families; the most important thing is loving and caring for each other. I wish people could see how much they are damaging their children when they treat them like "throwaways." That type of behavior will be repeated generation after generation.
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I put parents in quotations because you really can't call some people parents, they are more like breeders.
My son who is 12 came home with tears in his eyes yesterday. He is friends with a little boy at school that I had heard was newly adopted. He said his friend told him that the adopted parents decided they didn't want him so he was going back into foster care ad he did not know if he would ever be back at that school. He was previously in foster care because he said his mom didn't want him.
My heart is broken. What is wrong with people? Can you imagine being 12 and not knowing where you were going from one day to the next and who you would have to live with and take instructions from? That has to be terrifying.
I thought of my friend and fellow FC member Cathy. She has opened her home to foster children and does a fantastic job. I wish I could do something for this boy, but I know it take time to get approved to be a foster parent and I don't think you get to choose the child that stays with you anyway.
I had a child when I wasn't married. It was not planned and I could not really afford it, but we are a loving family, just he and I, and I would give my life for him. Would my life have been easier without him? Sure, but I could never have lived with myself. He is the joy of my life and I would do anything for him. Don't know why some people can throw kids away like trash.
wow thats messed up...even if he had family hed still be in a messed up situation not all people have close ties
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It sucks but alot of people should not have kids cause they can't raise them or they don't want them
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As of yesterday, the child is still at my son's school. My son did not ask him where he is staying. I contacted DSS and asked if there is anything I can do or if our phone number can at least be given to the foster parents where he ends up so that my son can stay in contact with him or that maybe we can have him over once in awhile. DSS, said they would be back in touch with me this week, but so far I have not heard anything. Yesterday the boy asked my son to have me contact DSS. That was interesting because I already had. I am not sure why he told my son that and he was not clear on it either. I don't want to prompt him to ask the child a bunch of personal information because he is probably already dealing with a lot, but I am very worried about the situation.
I'm really glad to see how much you care about his welfare and trying to keep in touch with him. He could use someone as loving and caring as you in his life. Most people just wouldn't even want to make it their problem. I really hope you will be able to stay in contact with him. Let us know how it works out.
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:dontknow: :sad1: It is so heartbreaking that people are so cruel and/or uncaring toward their children. I just don't get it. Children are so precious and there are so many people who would love to be able to have children that are unable. Children carry the weight of the world around sometimes. It is truly sad.
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So happy to see a loving, caring, concerned person trying to help. Children are a gift from God. They don't ask to be born. It sickens me how some people treat their children, yes like "throwaways" or abuse them. I hear horror stories everyday and I just don't understand. I also had my daughter unmarried, and she is and always has been first and most important in my life. There are so many people unable to have children and want them so badly, yet so many who are blessed enough to be able to never should have had the opportunity to do so. Very heartbreaking. Why would anyone make a child's life full of pain....
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I put parents in quotations because you really can't call some people parents, they are more like breeders.
Be that as it may, you've been around long enough to ask; are you sure this topic is a "Suggestions" forum topic, rather than an "Off Topic" subject?
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It's a mad mad world.
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It is so sad. Some parents would rather be their child's "friend" than discipline them. What these parents fail to realize is that they are only hurting their child in the long run. Oftentimes, schools not only educate but raise their children as well.
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This indeed is a sad story. I feel for this child who must live with people knowing in his heart they don't want him anymore. It is hard enough growing up with the regular day-to-day stuff that goes on, without knowing or having a loving family. I hope in some form or fashion you can help him samehett2.
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Agreed. What I find amazing is how you have to go through these hurdles to become a foster parent, and some couples want to have children but can't, and yet some people I see that have kids that really shouldn't. I mean, if you are going to go ahead and adopt someone, don't you think you'd consider how the kid is gonna feel about this. It's like the parents that buy their kid a puppy and then complain because the puppy need a ton of work. Uh, of course.
I'm more worried for the kid cause that's a horrible way to grow up. I see kids at my job where they could be off cutting themselves and the parents don't even notice. I'm not saying the kid should be attached to their hip or anything, but why aren't these parents at least trying to keep their kids under control. Yes, that might mean being the bad guy, do you really think letting them get away with stuff is going to make the rest of their life any easier.
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I agree! What I dont understand is the respect some of these kids give these parents. They so long for love and attention.
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it does seem like the people that dont need to be parents have more kids than those that would make wonderful parents