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Discussion Boards => Off-Topic => Debate & Discuss => Topic started by: skrogman on October 12, 2013, 02:47:54 am
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Occasionally, as the seasons change or the mood strikes, I like to re-arrange the furniture in my home for a different look. However, I have been told that since I am living with a vision impaired boyfriend, that this is just cruel. Is simply changing things really that wrong?
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Well, quite frankly, yes it's wrong. You're not "simply" changing things, you're rearranging his whole home life. At worst, for you, if the furniture stays the same, you get a little bored. At worst, for him, if the furniture is changed, he has to unnecessarily re-learn how to live in his own home as well as increase the potential of him harming himself.
I would hope you would ask him first and explain the lay out to him if he says ok. Keep in mind though, people say "ok" to things to be polite and not be the bad guy in the hopes that you'll think your way through it, consider them, and make the "right" decision yourself. .
I don't know him or your home life. That's just my take on it given the little bit of info I do have. Good luck with that.
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Occasionally, as the seasons change or the mood strikes, I like to re-arrange the furniture in my home for a different look. However, I have been told that since I am living with a vision impaired boyfriend, that this is just cruel. Is simply changing things really that wrong?
I agree it seems a bit selfish of you to do that to him just for the sake of aesthetics or whimsy...
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I would have to agree that it is not very nice.
My ex-husband use to laugh and say it was a good thing he was not Helen Keller in our house, because I always changed the furniture around he would never know where to sit if he couldn't see when he came home because of all of my rearranging. Before that never really thought about it alot, just liked to have change. So made me think it probably wasn't something even nice to do to someone who could see - should have left well enough alone.
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Depends on what you mean by, Visually disabled, if he can not see at all, then yes, you should only rearrange with his approval, but if he can see some (like a friend of mine) then changing around isn't that big a deal, just a warning is all that is needed.
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I suggest you ask for his input. That shows him that you care about his disability and that you want to change the room but care about his input. Changing the room without his approval is just plain wrong. You are leaving him out and expect him to accept the changes you made without his approval. :o :o :o :wave:
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It really depends on how bad his sight is. If it's bad, I would leave everything the way it is and not change anything. If you're bored with the look, try making small changes, different colored throw pillows, change nick-nacks on tables that he doesn't use a lot, little things like that. If his vision is just a little impaired, and you want to change furniture I would talk to him first, agree on moving certain pieces, and when done, tell him again what was changed.
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Hmmm....I think as long as you talk to him about it first it would be okay. I mean we've all been in the situation where it's pitch-dark in your own living room and you smash your foot into something your parents/bro/sis/roommate put there. It's aggrevating! Maybe make a plan with him where you can move the furniture, but it needs to only be in specific areas so he knows what to look out for. Make sure there's always clear paths and such.
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Thank you all for your input. You were all very helpful and I really like and appreciate the suggestion of changing the pillows, color, and decor for a different look and feel to the room. Those were great suggestions and now I am planning a Wal-Mart run!
:thumbsup: :wave:
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Maybe you could just change one thing at a time so he can get used to changes gradually.
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Occasionally, as the seasons change or the mood strikes, I like to re-arrange the furniture in my home for a different look. However, I have been told that since I am living with a vision impaired boyfriend, that this is just cruel. Is simply changing things really that wrong?
Wow. that is a hard question. I can understand how you like to change things around because I do the same thing. I also understand how someone might consider it to be an issue do to being visually impaired. I would imagine that change would bring on more difficulties for your boy-friend due too his impairment. You might could get him involved in the change and that would make him more comfortable with it. Hope that maybe this was a little help. :peace:
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I agree; it's important to have your boyfriend involved in the process.
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If he is on board with the idea or you tell him that you moved your furniture and where you have now placed it, I don't think there is anything wrong with that.
Now if you don't say a world that is pretty cruel. :-X
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I don't think you're intentionally being mean. Maybe talking to him and asking him and finding out his opinion would be best.
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The simple solution is to let him know that you moving things around, and get him involve in the process, then he will be aware of where things are, and everyone will be the happier for it.
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Yes, I believe it is cruel being that the other is vision deficiency. Your not just changing furniture but the way the person knows how to function within the home.
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I would not change it unless a piece were out of his path and was something he never used such as a sewing machine.
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as long as he is ok with the changes. I'm sure he gets bored of "not seeing" but he can't change anything.
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start home decorating service they make good money and fulfill your needs
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Occasionally, as the seasons change or the mood strikes, I like to re-arrange the furniture in my home for a different look. However, I have been told that since I am living with a vision impaired boyfriend, that this is just cruel. Is simply changing things really that wrong?
Ask your boyfriend what he thinks...go fung shui
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yes, especially if he is falling down and bumping into things. you know what it's like to stump your toe, it hurts!! is decorating really all that important? make life simple and easy for boyfriend, don't be a headache for him. :BangHead:
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It would not hurt to ask first and see if your partner will accept the fact that he would have to learn the layout of living space all over again.
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Occasionally, as the seasons change or the mood strikes, I like to re-arrange the furniture in my home for a different look. However, I have been told that since I am living with a vision impaired boyfriend, that this is just cruel. Is simply changing things really that wrong?
I hope you ask him first before you move things around. Hopefully you don't move so many things around that he can't navigate his environment. Im sure the two of you will work it out.
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Occasionally, as the seasons change or the mood strikes, I like to re-arrange the furniture in my home for a different look. However, I have been told that since I am living with a vision impaired boyfriend, that this is just cruel. Is simply changing things really that wrong?
Hmmm Maybe I shouldn't bring this up but a good friend of mine used to rearrange her house everytime her husband went out drinking.
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i would really hope before you move things that you tell him what is gong to happen !!!! Then he can learn where things are as you change them :)
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Work together on this and both of you will be happy. :)
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You don't sound like you are trying to be cruel, maybe a bit thoughtless. I agree with those who said it depends on how disabled he is. Also, I agree that you should talk to him first and get his input. Maybe both of you would be happy with a little change at a time. I can empathize with you, however. I like to change the furniture around once in a while. It gets so boring after awhile.
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Man if this was the only problem i had id buy a new livin room set every month!!
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My son has poor vision - I've never once thought about how my going in his room and rearranging things could be cruel. I've always thought of it as making things look nicer and user friendly. After all he shares a room with 2 sisters. Now he's not blind by all means but he does have horrible vision - so much so he had an IEP in grade school because of it and his teachers didn't bother teaching him how to write in cursive. I'm going to ask him his thoughts on this.
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Maybe you could get your "fix" for seasonal changes by new or seasonal centerpieces and decorator items that would make no difference in his navigating through his living space. If that is not enough change for you, make several sets of curtains in seasonal colors and patterns and rotate them throughout the year. If you don't sew and money is an issue (and when is it not), try garage sales or thrift stores for these items and maybe some colorful afghans for wall hangings or to drape over the backs of chairs/sofa.
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I believe the answer is up to him. Ask him if he minds and if he says no then don't do it. but if he says no problem then it is okay. He is the only one you should be asking.
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I asked my son about this since he too is visually impaired and I make it a habit of rearranging things in he and his sisters rooms. Mind you they share a room so I'm always trying to create ways to make it user friendly. He said he doesn't mind because he understands why I'm making these changes. Now that he's older he takes part in it so he's able to keep track of his stuff too. He's 14 now - I imagine when he was 6 or 8 years old it drove him crazy not knowing where I'd moved his lego's and hot wheels.