Are people who are Childfree selfish?

[ButterflyWings]

I think it is selfish to have kids you don't want to raise or be a parent too..I know way to many of these..

Me too...'tis what I dislike the most, parents who seem like they don't even LIKE their kids or can't be bothered to properly raise them (most recent example: little kids outside my window running a muck in the dark at 11:30 at night!  Um, the parents are obviously not concerned about pedophiles).

And yes it's true it's all how you raise them...but I wouldn't want my kids around other people's brats.  Bad influence!  lol

Yes and I see so many parents like this their kids are a nuisance and inconvenience..And I am known in my neighborhood as the overprotective snob parent lmao cause I will not let my kids run like animals and I know where they are and what they are doing.. So I wear that badge proudly lol..And Bratty kids with no respect my kids want nothing to do with them cause I raised them to be proper little people :0)

[lucky382001]

I don't think it's selfish but my sister has had to deal with this with people feeling she is selfish or weird or something because she chose not to have kids.

[liljp617]

I am a 40 year old childless woman and have been married happily for 6 years. I am happy that I don't have any children and I don't think that I am selfish for not adding to the worlds population. Why would I want to bring a child into this world with all the war, hate, crime and economic instability. There was a time in my life when I wanted to have a child, but a fight with cancer took that chance away. Today I am glad that I don't have children and the wish to have them does not exist anymore. I have 3 very sweet and loving cats and to me they are my children. They are less expensive that human children. I don't have to worry about forking out thousands of dollars to feed and clothe them each year and I don't have to worry about how can I afford to send them to college.

Ummmm... the topic is if you consider it selfish to not have kids. You said it isn't then listed several selfish reason that you don't.

err no, she didn't really

[walksalone11]

We need smarter people to have babies or we will go instinct on account of all the idiots having babies.

Please tell me you don't plan on reproducing..........

[queenofnines]

We need smarter people to have babies or we will go instinct on account of all the idiots having babies.

Please tell me you don't plan on reproducing..........

Haha!  As Mario of Super Galaxy would say, "That's cold.  Deep-space cold."  

[ArcaneAmoeba]

Back on the topic, I believe that the topic of having kids or not is kind of an interesting topic to think about.  If a person is smart, they're statistically less likely to have kids.  The less intelligent a person is the more kids they tend to have.  If the world was perfect it would work in reverse: the intelligent people would have giant genius families and the stupid people would have no kids at all.  Then the human race would continue to increase their collective intelligence by forced evolution.  Unfortunately the only method of bringing this about would be to form a totalitarian global government system.

[queenofnines]

Latest article I found on this issue:

http://nymag.com/news/features/67024/   

[queenofnines]

I used to want kids when I was a kid and had no clue what was involved.  Then I started baby-sitting -- best birth control ever!

[shernajwine]

I used to want kids when I was a kid and had no clue what was involved.  Then I started baby-sitting -- best birth control ever!

LOL

i'm the oldest of 5 children and used to have to watch my brothers and sisters and it was horrible. at 12 years old i was making dinner, giving baths, supervising homework, doing laundry while my dad worked and my mom went to school. when i moved out at 18 and got married i thought i was home free cuz i thought i couldn't have children! HA but oh well i love my babies lol 

[rrechy225]

I don't think it's selfish.  I have a child and I think it's wonderful but I fully acknowledge that not everyone is like me.     I don't deem people who do not have children as selfish.

[tantricia44]

I think having a child because of pressure from family/friends or spouse is selfish because the tension alone will destroy the child & possibly the marriage. I don't think that people who decide to be child free are selfish. They have a right to not have children if they don't want them. They are thinking about not wanting to produce an unwanted being into a world with already billions of parent less unwanted children in foster homes. There are homeless children all over the world not just in American. I for one don't want to have children of my own, I prefer the four legged children. When I was younger I thought that I would want kids but later on in life, I changed my mind & my husband was in agreement. Though, now that my husband has passed, I'm thinking maybe I should have had one since he was the last of his line. Ok,  I was thinking off the wall now, I can barely take care of myself now that I'm alone. How much more for another life. So, I think the most selfish thing anyone can do is to have children when they know they don't want them.

[queenofnines]

I think the most selfish thing anyone can do is to have children when they know they don't want them.

Agreed.  It is also selfish to have children "just because that's the thing to do" in our society without ever really considering if you are financially, emotionally, mentally, physically ready to have them.  One needs to look past the fun bits of babies and their kids saying something cute and remember that raising kids is a tremendous, tiring responsibility!

[belleg1]

I'm glad I didn't bring a child into this world. The world is moving on and in a bad way, how much longer can this planet last anyway? I chose not to inflict that on a sweet child.

[jordandog]

One needs to look past the fun bits of babies and their kids saying something cute and remember that raising kids is a tremendous, tiring responsibility!

So true, queenofnines. I knew I wanted children and I also knew it was a huge, and lifelong, undertaking. Mine might all be out of the house now, but my responsibilities to them has not ended, it has simply changed. I have mentioned before that after almost 14 years of marriage, my husband decided HE had had enough and disappeared, literally - it took me 3+ years to track him down and he never did wind up supporting them or me in any way, shape, or form. He was smart enough to go to a state that had no reciprocity with the state we lived in and he knew damn well I had neither the time, resources, or tons of money to go where HE was, hire an attorney there, and spend who knows how much time fighting him in court. I had 3 sons to take care of and was also working 50-60 hours a week in a hospital - with absolutely NO help from my family. I was the proverbial 'Black Sheep' for having tainted the family name by divorcing - wicked, wicked woman am I!  I am beyond thankful for my small circle of people I consider my best friends because without THEIR help, I would have been riddled with guilt for times I couldn't be and do everything - like when I was on-call and had to take off in the middle of the night. I knew I could pick up the phone and any one of them would be at the house in minutes, no questions asked.

There were many days I was beyond exhausted, but I was the one who signed up for motherhood and all that went with it. We ate dinners together as much as possible, I never missed a parent-teacher conference, baseball/sports game of any kind, awards ceremonies, they ate healthy, and above all knew they were loved and appreciated - should say appreciated other than holes in plaster walls, broken windows, etc. when attempts to 'kill each other' failed. I am not saying I was superwoman and I was far from perfect, but they all turned out to be pretty wonderful 'pieces' of this society and world we live in.

I have heard more parents (than I could possibly put a number on) say,"What was I thinking when I wanted to get pregnant/had kids?!" On the flipside, I can probably count on one hand how many childless I have heard say, "What was I thinking when I didn't want kids?" Not ONE of my close friends have ever said that, but they do joke that they are 'surrogates' for helping me with mine when they were young. I apologize for running on so long here - day off and way too much coffee.

[queenofnines]

they all turned out to be pretty wonderful 'pieces' of this society and world we live in.

I don't doubt it!     Like others have mentioned before, we NEED at least some intelligent people/atheists having or adopting kids, otherwise it ain't looking so pretty for humanity... lol