Should I?

[froggylover227]

Ok, so as many of you probably know, I'm supposed to be moving from New Jersey to Massachusetts next January. Last week I had the talk with my parents, but haven't had a chance to really sit down and explain everything to my two sisters, but they have a general idea. My problem is this: I told my parents that I would be applying for jobs around November/December unless a good opportunity came up sooner. Well, a couple of good opportunities have come up. I signed up for a job alert e-mail, and there are 2 potential positions that I really think I should apply for. Of course, that would mean me moving A LOT sooner than expected, which I am fine with, it's my family that I'm worried about. When I had the talk with my parents, my mom kept saying "well, as long as this isn't happening tomorrow" but at this point, I don't want to miss out on a good job opportunity because she isn't "ready" to see me leave yet. Plus, it's getting really harder emotionally to leave my boyfriend to go back home after spending time with him. There are days when I am with him that I just want to say "screw it, I'm not going back to Jersey!". Do you think I should apply for those jobs? And if I am offered the position, how do I break it to my family that I'll be moving much sooner than they thought? Any advice is greatly appreciated, and thank you in advance!

[FreakinRican109]

Congrats on your job offers! Two to choose from is great, much luck with your choice. Now to your problem...When i was 19, my parents, grandparents and younger brother had enough of NY and was heading to Florida. I was given a choice if i wanted to go or take over my grandparents apartment. So i stood and was on my own. Worked out well even though i had to learn a lot of things on my own about bills and budgeting and not letting partying take control of my money,  . Fast forward and i'm now the parent of a 24 and 17 year old. My oldest completed his college time in Cobleskill NY and when he came back decided he was going to move out and my wife and I were ok about since he was going to be in the same town. Now he is visiting Colorado and is looking to relocate there. I was surprised to see my wife comfortable with his future actions but she feels confident that he is mature enough to be in another state and not have us nearby to help him out. That being said I think she would have had a different opinion if our "son" was our "daughter". Yes for parents the thought of sons going and doing what they please is normal but when it comes to daughters, everything changes. You know the old band aid saying? It will hurt more if you slowly peel it off than if you just pulled it off quickly and get it over with. My best friends daughter just recently moved from virignia to Las Vegas and he was an emotional wreck but knew that one day she would leave to be on her own. Now she is doing well and he feels so much better. Plus with this tech age we are in he can face time with her anytime if he needs to. Bottom line, your parents will miss  and worry about you, thats normal but dont let that get in the way of living your life and taking risks to advance in your career. I hope this helps and once again good luck!

[vickysue]

Are you sure that it is your parents that really worried about you or are you just  a little scared about moving out on your own. sometimes we confuse the two, so talk with your parents again and let them know just how you feel about your boyfriend and the job .  You just might be surprised.

[BlackSheepNY]

Ok, so as many of you probably know, I'm supposed to be moving from New Jersey to Massachusetts next January. Last week I had the talk with my parents, but haven't had a chance to really sit down and explain everything to my two sisters, but they have a general idea. My problem is this: I told my parents that I would be applying for jobs around November/December unless a good opportunity came up sooner. Well, a couple of good opportunities have come up. I signed up for a job alert e-mail, and there are 2 potential positions that I really think I should apply for. Of course, that would mean me moving A LOT sooner than expected, which I am fine with, it's my family that I'm worried about. When I had the talk with my parents, my mom kept saying "well, as long as this isn't happening tomorrow" but at this point, I don't want to miss out on a good job opportunity because she isn't "ready" to see me leave yet. Plus, it's getting really harder emotionally to leave my boyfriend to go back home after spending time with him. There are days when I am with him that I just want to say "screw it, I'm not going back to Jersey!". Do you think I should apply for those jobs? And if I am offered the position, how do I break it to my family that I'll be moving much sooner than they thought? Any advice is greatly appreciated, and thank you in advance!

Well, if it were me, I would make it clear to my parents that you've already started looking for a job in your new area of choice.  You can then ease them in to the fact that if such a job came up and it was offered to you, that you would be moving sooner than expected.  At least they'd have a 'head's up' on your intentions.

You'll be moving anyway.  This they already know is a fact.  It shouldn't make them any more stressed out if you had to go sooner than later.  I would think it would set their minds at ease to know that you've found a job as it was a concern of theirs before.  Try not to think about the fact that it's getting harder to leave your boyfriend.  Prepare yourself with that job you'll need.  We all like to think that life can be perfect, yet we all know it isn't.  Remember, this is a boyfriend, not a husband (yet, anyway, and don't know what your intentions are as a "couple" to marry).  You'll need the job to help pay bills, etc., but be smart and keep a separate account for yourself.  Should something turn out where you're NOT happy in MA., at least you'll have the money to get home again.

[Nancy5]

Congratulations on the 2 job offers.  I would definitely apply for them (you never know if a chsnce like that will come again).  If you are accepted and want the job, then take it.  Your parents know you are planning to move, what difference does it really make if you move in March or next January?  Yes it will be hard, but once you make the move you will realize it really wasn't that hard after all.  Like I said before, it's your life, you have to live your life for you, not for anyone else.  Go for it and be happy!

[Suziesus1]

Thts great

[debidoo]

Well I would take it a day at a time.  First yes I would apply for the jobs.  Then if you don't get offered either one then you will know its not time.  If you do then even though your mom might be disappointed she will come to grips with it.  Well best of luck with your decisions.

[pmagalei]

I don't know about you but when I faced with challenges like that, I get down on my knees and pray to Heavenly Father to give me some confirmation that this is the solution that I am seeking. I promise you that He will answer. It is just a matter of knowing that family will always be important. But If you want to succeed and be self reliant for yourself and your future, then follow the promptings that you will receive after you ask God.

[Skyisbluetoday]

I would put your application's in and see if you get one or both job's, they may or may not need you asap, and that would give you a chance to get the moving arrangements made, plus your parent's should understand that you did mention to them that if a good opportunity came up sooner, you would most likely be moving sooner. Best of Luck to you! 

[autumnsparklemom]

Go with your heart. Know your parents will miss you, but don't let great jobs pass you by.

[masked_brown_guy]

at least you are not leaving the country, right? reach your goals and assure your parents you are not too far away from them.

[Liquidfire_43]

Moving away from New Jersey is a pretty good idea... There is not much job opportunities there.. I will probably have to move too, since they dont have a lot of entry level electrical engineer tech available in my area.... Just make sure you have enough money if things do not go well

[aggie49]

well i agree with everyone who has posted on this all i can say is make sure it is what you really want

[natashaspy]

do what feels right for you.  I'm sure your family will miss you but if they really love you they'll understand.  make them part of the packing up/moving process...invite them to visit you.  maybe that will make things a little better

[countrygirl12]

Ok, so as many of you probably know, I'm supposed to be moving from New Jersey to Massachusetts next January. Last week I had the talk with my parents, but haven't had a chance to really sit down and explain everything to my two sisters, but they have a general idea. My problem is this: I told my parents that I would be applying for jobs around November/December unless a good opportunity came up sooner. Well, a couple of good opportunities have come up. I signed up for a job alert e-mail, and there are 2 potential positions that I really think I should apply for. Of course, that would mean me moving A LOT sooner than expected, which I am fine with, it's my family that I'm worried about. When I had the talk with my parents, my mom kept saying "well, as long as this isn't happening tomorrow" but at this point, I don't want to miss out on a good job opportunity because she isn't "ready" to see me leave yet. Plus, it's getting really harder emotionally to leave my boyfriend to go back home after spending time with him. There are days when I am with him that I just want to say "screw it, I'm not going back to Jersey!". Do you think I should apply for those jobs? And if I am offered the position, how do I break it to my family that I'll be moving much sooner than they thought? Any advice is greatly appreciated, and thank you in advance!

How old are you?  If you are an adult it is your life.  Why were you planning to wait until next January?