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Topic: Mental health  (Read 703 times)

cateyes1

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Mental health
« on: June 15, 2021, 02:54:16 am »
Lets make this a place that we can go to if we feel stressed out, some where to just vent.

I feel overwhelmed by taking care of everyone. I do enjoy it most times but I some times wish they would help them self more when I know they can. I have spoiled my family by doing so much that I think they forget how to do something as simple as taking out the trash. I use to feel like if you want something done just do it your self UGH. but now I just want the help the older I am getting, anyone else feel this way?...what stresses YOU out?

stevensm4

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #1 on: June 15, 2021, 05:24:50 am »
I do. I used to handle submitting documents, doing proposals, finding the right building forms for his business but even the  smallest things that he could do and I have seen him do it, he can't be bothered to do it anymore or just never wanted to do it period. Now, after the big blow out, any potential interaction with him is stressing me out.
"Let me ask you something. If the rule you followed brought you to this, of what use was the rule?"

cateyes1

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #2 on: June 15, 2021, 05:28:28 am »
I do. I used to handle submitting documents, doing proposals, finding the right building forms for his business but even the  smallest things that he could do and I have seen him do it, he can't be bothered to do it anymore or just never wanted to do it period. Now, after the big blow out, any potential interaction with him is stressing me out.

I'm sorry he is stressing you out  Steve. Is he trying to guilt you into keep doing it? (does that make sense)

stevensm4

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #3 on: June 15, 2021, 05:47:44 am »
^I mean he tried but I fought against it. I'm not going to be obligated to do his job for him because he clearly doesn't want to do it himself.
"Let me ask you something. If the rule you followed brought you to this, of what use was the rule?"

cateyes1

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #4 on: June 15, 2021, 05:51:30 am »
^I mean he tried but I fought against it. I'm not going to be obligated to do his job for him because he clearly doesn't want to do it himself.


Good for you stick to your guns so to speak

Nancy5

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #5 on: June 15, 2021, 06:24:05 am »
Lets make this a place that we can go to if we feel stressed out, some where to just vent.

I feel overwhelmed by taking care of everyone. I do enjoy it most times but I some times wish they would help them self more when I know they can. I have spoiled my family by doing so much that I think they forget how to do something as simple as taking out the trash. I use to feel like if you want something done just do it your self UGH. but now I just want the help the older I am getting, anyone else feel this way?...what stresses YOU out?



I think that happens to most moms.  I know I always wanted to everything for my girls and husband.  Now that I look back I did too much.  It was always easier to do it yourself because it would be done right.  My girls are long gone and have their own families.  My husband and I had some major bumps in the road, but things have settled down and he is now doing more than before.  Not sure if he realizes he was wrong in not doing things before, or if it was just guilt on his part.
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mrsmere

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #6 on: June 15, 2021, 06:28:56 am »
I'm not stressed but I have been doing so much for others and now that I'm older things are slowly get turned over to them.  I still make sure their car payments and credit cards are made on time with their money. I got them charge cards at age 16 to start building credit and really never let them have any responsibility, both guys are in the 30's and it's past time they took over their own affairs.  I'm having the talk today.

mrsmere

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #7 on: June 15, 2021, 06:33:15 am »
Nancy 5 you are right moms know it will get done.  My boys are gone but they always call when an issue comes up because they know I will handle it.  One even wanted me to pay a parking ticket from his account.  Thinking back I realize this is enabling them and they need to stop relying on me so much to do simple things. 

kleenex40

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #8 on: June 15, 2021, 10:54:09 am »
I used to feel overwhemed when i was married ,i would do everthing around the house ,its like nobody wanted to lift a finger and help out,i kinda felt like everyones maid. If i didnt do anything nothing would get done(the dishes would pile up,same with the laundry and if i didnt mow the lawn the grass would get knee high,the house would look like trash)even when i asked for help,nobody want to help out,i just think its pure lazyness.I dont like to clean ether but i do it anyways cause i dont like to live in filth,the house dont have to be perfect just decent looking

ktheodos

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #9 on: June 16, 2021, 05:49:23 am »
I hope people feel this is a safe space, though it can be tough with just written words as interactions (not face-to-face)

ghunter

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #10 on: June 16, 2021, 06:01:40 am »
Mental health is so real

linderlizzie

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #11 on: June 16, 2021, 10:55:57 am »
I think everyone I know is not as lazy as I think I am. My kids washed their own clothes so it would be done to their satisfaction and were on their own before you even knew what happened. The last one was a little slower to do so and he still needs a little financial help.

Tell people what you need and they might just help you out.

I'm not trying to minimize your problems, cateyes1, but don't let them stay problems until you're crazy.  :peace:

Donnamarg323

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #12 on: June 16, 2021, 03:28:44 pm »
Lets make this a place that we can go to if we feel stressed out, some where to just vent.

I feel overwhelmed by taking care of everyone. I do enjoy it most times but I some times wish they would help them self more when I know they can. I have spoiled my family by doing so much that I think they forget how to do something as simple as taking out the trash. I use to feel like if you want something done just do it your self UGH. but now I just want the help the older I am getting, anyone else feel this way?...what stresses YOU out?
This is one of my fav scriptures at 2nd Tim 3:16

All scripture is inspired by God for teaching,reproving and setting matters straight.

First it tells us that Jehovah God wrote the bible and used men to write it down like a secretary takes dictation from her boss.

It also reminds us and teaches us the TRUTH!!Any questions RE life,the answers can be found there.It is a shame that Satan has blinded many to lies RE it.

Satan and man have even tried to get rid of the bible.....But God would NOT allow that to happen.

Seek and ye shall find.

bretay

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Re: Mental health
« Reply #13 on: June 17, 2021, 05:48:25 am »
i am glad it is just hubby and me now..kids are grown..have 2 grandkids..we have a small house so its fine for the 2 of us..easy to clean and we work together..at the moment i do good to care of myself...not sure i could do it again...would if i had to...but so tired as i get older..
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