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Topic: Things to PONDER  (Read 3717 times)

cateyes1

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Things to PONDER
« on: March 05, 2012, 12:19:15 pm »
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?


Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway...

Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's
Face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Why, Why, Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four
Billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?


Why do they use sterilized needles
For death by lethal injection?


Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what colour bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a thread a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

And my FAVORITE.........

The statistics on sanity is that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.



~~~ Now send this on to your friends and make them smile too! ~~~

africanclaudie

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #1 on: March 05, 2012, 12:49:55 pm »
Phew, "Cateyes1" has just given me plenty to ponder about during the day.....! Now I'm going to battle with these questions till my eyes pop out.

cateyes1

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #2 on: March 05, 2012, 12:53:13 pm »
Phew, "Cateyes1" has just given me plenty to ponder about during the day.....! Now I'm going to battle with these questions till my eyes pop out.


LOL, when you figure them out can you let me know? my brain is to tired to think anymore  :wave:

kingozzy

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #3 on: March 05, 2012, 01:22:48 pm »
Oh no than I must be a little nuts !!  thats ok my other self is pretty sain

Azanne07

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #4 on: March 05, 2012, 02:18:10 pm »
round pizza is probably easier to make. But square boxes are easier that round boxes.  idk just a thought

queenofnines

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #5 on: March 06, 2012, 08:59:36 am »
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

This one is incorrect, and I hope none of you run around saying this if your intention is to appear smart.
"It is far better to grasp the universe as it really is than to persist in delusion, however satisfying and reassuring."
-- Carl Sagan

oldbuddy

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #6 on: March 06, 2012, 09:01:52 am »
Tell you what, you guys have fun pondering and I will go make some more money.  :heart:

mintopewku

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #7 on: March 06, 2012, 09:04:40 am »
I agree with oldbuddy, I like the one liners.  Def good watercooler talk.  But too much to ponder in one sitting.  LOL

LenoraMinogue

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #8 on: March 06, 2012, 03:33:36 pm »
Great things to ponder. Here's another one. What the difference between outlaws and inlaws? Outlaws are wanted, har har har.

handllucas

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #9 on: March 06, 2012, 04:00:02 pm »
LOL.Very good questions

abdyer2001

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #10 on: March 06, 2012, 04:16:13 pm »
why do we tste spoiled milk in the refrigerator , then put it back  once we know its bad.

or taste something spoiled then hand it to someone else and say " does this taste right to you "

fc2

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #11 on: March 06, 2012, 06:42:31 pm »
Things like making my first $25.00 paycheck in here is something for me to ponder on  :angel11:
FC2

luvh8tragedy87

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #12 on: March 06, 2012, 09:58:03 pm »
Very nice  :) Defintely some interesting things to ponder.

articx

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #13 on: March 07, 2012, 12:12:49 pm »
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
I thought they would wear gowns, and have a halo hovering over their heads.

Quote
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
Square boxes are cheaper to make than round boxes.

Quote
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Wheels on luggage was a solution to a problem, and people were not aware of the problem yet.

Quote
Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway...
Patients would probably complaint if doctors stayed in the room. Or they use that time to speak to other patients instead of wasting it to wait for someone to undress.

Quote
Why, Why, Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?
If they don't press harder, they wouldn't be able to change the channel.

Quote
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough money?
It is an opportunity to take money from people.

Quote
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Some men can barely grow a bread, and Tarzan is one of them.

veronica773

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Re: Things to PONDER
« Reply #14 on: March 07, 2012, 12:50:33 pm »
Some very interested things to ponder.  But I like to add one.  When you get to heaven what does your spirit look like.  I  know you eat another body in heaven. When you died your body changes 5 times to get your body adapted to heaven.  A preacher told me that one day.

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