Parents Won't Pay for College

[tartarsauce2008]

So, my mom isn't paying for college and told the rest of the family that if any of them tried to help me, they'll basically be shunned by her. So, any idea on how I can make enough money for school?

[queenofnines]

Your mom is going to "shun" the rest of the family if they offer to help you pay for your education?  Wow...sorry to say this, but that's screwed up!  Why on earth would your mother stand in the way of you being able to go to college like that?  Does she have some weird issues with borrowing money or something?

I say...you're 18, you can make your own decisions now.  If the rest of the family wants to help you go to college, LET THEM.  It's incredibly selfish of your mom to stand in the way of you getting assistance with your education for what sounds like bogus reasons. 

Remember, your mom's opinion doesn't really matter once you're an adult.  You need to look out for and take care of YOURSELF.

[masked_brown_guy]

get a loan and join the society of debt.

[Lindaroof]

There are a lot of ways to get assistance for schooling. Maybe your Mother doesn't have the means to pay for your schooling, and maybe she thinks by you doing it on your own like a lot of people do, that you will learn the hard lessons of life. I don't know what her reasons are to say that if anyone else in the family helped she would shun them, I would have to say if I were in your family and was fortunate enough to be able to help you, it probably wouldn't bother me if your mother shunned me, So keep your chin up and do what you have to do to get what you want in life, go out and get it for yourself.

[tartarsauce2008]

Your mom is going to "shun" the rest of the family if they offer to help you pay for your education?  Wow...sorry to say this, but that's screwed up!  Why on earth would your mother stand in the way of you being able to go to college like that?  Does she have some weird issues with borrowing money or something?

I say...you're 18, you can make your own decisions now.  If the rest of the family wants to help you go to college, LET THEM.  It's incredibly selfish of your mom to stand in the way of you getting assistance with your education for what sounds like bogus reasons. 

Remember, your mom's opinion doesn't really matter once you're an adult.  You need to look out for and take care of YOURSELF.

No, the problem is they WON'T help me because she's going to shun them. She's doing this because I'm dating a black guy. She's always wanted to break us apart, but she couldn't find a reason to, so when prom season came around, he asked me out to prom, and she told me it was disrespectful. And I was like," Umm...no?" And she was like," I'm not gonna raise you in the American culture. I went without a prom, and I'm still alive. You're just gonna sell yourself to him, aren't you?" and proceeded to tell me that she's going to ruin my life.

[tartarsauce2008]

There are a lot of ways to get assistance for schooling. Maybe your Mother doesn't have the means to pay for your schooling, and maybe she thinks by you doing it on your own like a lot of people do, that you will learn the hard lessons of life. I don't know what her reasons are to say that if anyone else in the family helped she would shun them, I would have to say if I were in your family and was fortunate enough to be able to help you, it probably wouldn't bother me if your mother shunned me, So keep your chin up and do what you have to do to get what you want in life, go out and get it for yourself.

No, she HAS the money to put me through college. I'm pretty sure this is her revenge, though.

[tashamjoy]

I guess this is on you to decide I mean there are ways to go to college like getting loans but honestly you really want too have lots of loans?!?!? I mean you may get FASFA but if your mom has the money you may not qualify for loans I guess its up to you its your life maybe dating this guy is not a good idea i do not want to be mean but sometimes life is hard and you have to do whats best for your future and that may be stop dating this back guy sorry if thats not what you want to hear

[tartarsauce2008]

I guess this is on you to decide I mean there are ways to go to college like getting loans but honestly you really want too have lots of loans?!?!? I mean you may get FASFA but if your mom has the money you may not qualify for loans I guess its up to you its your life maybe dating this guy is not a good idea i do not want to be mean but sometimes life is hard and you have to do whats best for your future and that may be stop dating this back guy sorry if thats not what you want to hear

She's the one overreacting. She called the police to report him for sexual harassment because he asked me out to prom.

[tashamjoy]

I see she may be over reacting but i am just saying this is not about blaming this is your future and unless this boyfriend is gonna take care of you who else will if your mom wont I am just trying to help you this is your future

[tartarsauce2008]

I see she may be over reacting but i am just saying this is not about blaming this is your future and unless this boyfriend is gonna take care of you who else will if your mom wont I am just trying to help you this is your future

Wait I wasn't talking about the boyfriend at all, I was talking about how she's not going to pay for college no matter what. She disowned me for being her daughter for "touching a black guy"

[dreamyxo]

Although I completely disagree with her reasons for doing it, parents are nor required nor obligated to pay for college for their children.  She is doing this to control you.  When you turn 18 you will be an adult and will have the freedom to live your own life as you see fit.  You have two choices if you want to have an easy time and have her pay for your education you need to break up with your boyfriend and bend to her will and follow her rules.  She is paying the cost to be the boss. 

You can continue to let her control you with money or you can stop being a child and take your life into your own hands, refuse to be bullied and controlled by her and pay for it yourself.  You are not the only one to not have parents pay for school and you won't be the last.  You should start by looking under every rock and apply for every scholarship and grant you can, even if you think you might not be eligible try anyway.  Ask your guidance counselor to help you.

Do you play sports, an instrument, have an unusual skill or talent?  There are scholarships for that.  What's your ethnicity (they have scholarships for every ethnic group on earth) look into that.  Do your parents belong to any professional organizations?  Look there.  What's your religion?  Look there.  Do you participate in extra curricular activities?  Look there. 

Get a job.  Make up a job.  Babysit, be a pet sitter.  Run errands for your elderly neighbors.  Don't pass up anyway to earn extra money.  Join the military they will give you money to go to school.  Community colleges are cheaper.  You can take your core classes there for less then transfer to a four year university later.  In the mean time make sure your grades are are excellent.  If all else fails get a loan. 

Oh yes and if you decide to continue to see your boyfriend I suggest you move out as soon as you can.  Choose a college that's far away.  If she is going to act like this now it will get even worse if she is controlling the purse stings.

Good luck.

[wittylance]

So, my mom isn't paying for college and told the rest of the family that if any of them tried to help me, they'll basically be shunned by her. So, any idea on how I can make enough money for school?

You don't need anyone to help you with your education go online and apply for government grant, and than what ever school your going to can help you find companies that will loan you the money to go. Thats what my mom did when she went back to college a couple years ago.

[tzs]

So, my mom isn't paying for college and told the rest of the family that if any of them tried to help me, they'll basically be shunned by her. So, any idea on how I can make enough money for school?

If you are old enough to go to college and have a long term relationship, Get A Job!!!!!!

[twol]

My friend's parents told him that he would never go to college, and that they wouldn't support him if he tried. So he got a job, moved out, applied for as much aid as possible, and is now in his second year of college. Pretty much slapped them in the face by busting his ***. He's my hero

[jski107]

I'm sorry  to hear that because it is extremely difficult to pay for college without any help.  I would suggest looking into scholarships, loans/grants, and financial aid.