elderly

[betlynjua]

This is a hard thing to go thru. It's very hard on everyone involved.

Is that ever true.  I know from experience that this is a transition that is not always smooth.  I try very hard to continue assigning dignity to the elderly ones.  When it comes to the role reversal; the younger one now assisting the older one, many prayers are needed.

[bhiett]

Get her doctor involved in the discussion; sometimes physicians are better equipped to convince a person that lifestyle changes need to be made.  That does not always work.  If she is really unsafe, the last resort would be to talk to Adult Protective Services through DHS.  They can investigate and evaluate and enforce placement in an appropriate living situation, which would remove you from "being the bad guy" (unless she knows you were the one who involved them).  The worst case scenario would be to wait until she has an injurious fall or other accident, which no one wants to happen, but some people are convinced only by such extreme occurrences.

[hensleyll]

i just removed my self from the situation it was borderline hostile and i have enough stress in my own home and dealings right now

[JaniceSW]

Please contact Adult Protective Services or look in your phonebook and get an eldercare agency involved.  It is imperative that this lady receive care and not be neglected or abused and have a dignified ending to her life.  Please follow up with the agency.  Tell them you want to remain anonymous and this just takes phone calls to deal with the matter.  Think about it as if this was your mother or grandmother.  We must all take care of our children and elderly.  We ALL will be there someday! 

[sak4kat]

Thank the Lord there is someone like you there to take care of the 98 year old woman.  I hope you are being rewarded for your time and physical burden it puts on you.  For a child it can be hard to accept that our parents   Good heavens though 98 years gone by her daughter should certainly understand at this point Mom needs to be treated more like a patient.

[hensleyll]

will she is now going to adult daycare and also has a social worker who comes to the house

[sarabtrayior]

I am glad she had you to take care of her, the daughter in in denial and she won't see it until her mom dies...

[hensleyll]

well i am not there now but am told her daughter takes more time off work to be there and she finally put her in adult daycare where they have nurses on call at all times

[tfw6693]

  Catch them at a quiet time and very calmly tell them the truth. If they blow you off, go back and repeat it again until they get the point across. Sometimes people are so wrapped up in themselves they refuse to acknowledge the truth. They may be afraid or scared and ignoring you is an escape. 

[hensleyll]

No My days are full of little ones instead

[sarabtrayior]

Kids only see what they want to see, they pay only what they HAVE to pay so I have no clue for what you can do.