Rewarding kids for bad behavior

[demaina]

I'm amazed at the amount of kids I see walk through my job that whine, complain, yell, and do plenty of other things, that are then rewarded for it by getting some fudge.  That or kids who stand in front of our fudge counter and point at one, whining that they don't want the one the parents bought but this other flavor, and eventually the parents cave and buy it for them.

I'm just fascinated cause I can't figure out why a parent would reward bad behavior.  In my eyes, all that teaches the kid is making a scene will get you what you want.  I could be wrong but it just doesn't make sense to me.

[cloudsoup]

the behavior started long before they reached the
fudge counter, i'm sure - probably in the crib! given every single
thing they've ever wanted, never hearing the word ''no''
and by the time it's completely out of control, the parents
would rather do anything than hear it whine/cry.

i see it at my work too, but then again, i've witnessed some
complete MELT DOWNS from kids who were actually told no,
and the parents really stick to it. then its ME who loses
patience and wishes the parent would just give it to them...lol.

but yeah. annoying all the way around.

[imwicked]

My daughter does that with her girl and drives me crazy. Don't know how to tell her it's wrong without getting her mad at me.

[mmccune1]

I tell my kids all the time that i do not reward bad behavior. So If they want to get things that they want and not what they need. they have to show me that they deserve it by doing their chores without me constantly reminding them. showing appreciation also is a must. A roof over there head and food in their stomachs should be enough. But sometimes girls ask for a little extra. But they must work for what they want.

[heatheram]

unfortunately my MIL is the SAME way with her youngest son. and has been for a long time... it's easier to agree and get them quiet than try and say no. at least in her opinion. It drives me crazy! all he has to do is whine and he gets his way. some parents don't have the desire to actually parent, especially by the time it's their third child. if my children ever acted like that... actually no, they won't. her problem is because she gave in