had a blow up with a friend

[aggie49]

i have been friends with this girl for over 20 years and today she just happend to say *bleep* to me that pissed me off to the point i wanted to beat the hell out of her but i was a bigger person and let my mouth do the talking i know she still will countine to *bleep* and complain about how she doesn't have this or that she doesn't like anything she complains she always alone so i told her she will always be alone if she does not stop complaining about everything or bitching all the time i told her she is the only one that can change her life and that there are people with a whole lot less and a whole lot less then she has but she won't listen or changing so i told her if she does not do something i will never talk to her again and we will not be friends no more i feel bad that i had to get nasty with her but i have had it she makes everything about her she does not seem to care about anything but her self do you think i am wrong  my husband and girls say no that they are shocked it took this long for me to blow up at her i just hope she open's her eyes before it is to late for her

[kimber62372]

It's unfortunate that you lost a friend over something so petty, but there is no right or wrong. If the girl is self centered and thinks the world revolves around her then all you  had to do was walk  away with a smile and tell her when she is all grown up, she can come talk to you. But it sounds to me that you were holding pent up anger towards her for a while now and could not take it anymore. It was meant to be, everything happens for a reason. If you care for her, she will most likely come back to you and apologize first. Good luck and hope everything turns out okay for you. Many blessings to you and your family this holiday season!

[aflyingmonkey]

You know that Mark Twain quote :
"Hang out with friends who are like-minded who are also designing purpose-filled lives. Similarly be that kind of a friend for your friends."

If you have friends that take more from you and cause a negative impact to your life, at some point you need to cut them loose, for your own well-being.  They are like dementors from Harry Potter, they suck all happiness out of you.

[killers2]

i hope your situation is resolved.  If she is an important friend it will!

[KarenWitty]

I am  so sorry about this. I would probably treat your friends the way you want to be treated and if they treat you back respectively keep them as a friend. If not, maybe they weren't good friend material in the first place. I always tell my boys..... do what is right and if they are your true friends they will understand and work things out. I have some great friends and I hope you find some too

[Penwoir]

That is a difficult situation but I agree with flying monkey. The problem with friends who are so negative is that it affects the people around them, which is you! I think, as a good friend, it is your duty to try to sympathize with them, however if the negativity gets overwhelming and you don't seem to be getting through, it is best for your own sanity that you cut out the dead wood or "prune" in order that you can continue to flourish.

[autumnsparklemom]

If you have been friends with her for that long, maybe you two can sit down and work out the situation. Just sit and listen to her. Maybe she just needed to vent and have someone listen. Is it really worth ending ending a friendship over something silly? Life is to short to bicker.

[Rahmanh]

I think you are absolutely right. You did the right thing and your friend sound like a spoiled brat.
 

[minioncookies]

Gl hopefully you resolve your situation maybe since its the holidays you two can find a common resolution

[countrygirl12]

There is a lot left out and with out hearing her side of it then it is hard to say you are right or she is right.  It's hard to believe you were best friends for 20 years and one day she is complaining and you just go off and don't want to be friends any longer.  It sounds like there was something else  going on.  And if she has always complained (for 20 years) why would it not bother you for 20 years and all of a sudden bother you.

[fillfran82]

i have been friends with this girl for over 20 years and today she just happend to say *bleep* to me that pissed me off to the point i wanted to beat the hell out of her but i was a bigger person and let my mouth do the talking i know she still will countine to *bleep* and complain about how she doesn't have this or that she doesn't like anything she complains she always alone so i told her she will always be alone if she does not stop complaining about everything or bitching all the time i told her she is the only one that can change her life and that there are people with a whole lot less and a whole lot less then she has but she won't listen or changing so i told her if she does not do something i will never talk to her again and we will not be friends no more i feel bad that i had to get nasty with her but i have had it she makes everything about her she does not seem to care about anything but her self do you think i am wrong  my husband and girls say no that they are shocked it took this long for me to blow up at her i just hope she open's her eyes before it is to late for her

Hello there! I don't think you are wrong. You made some valid points ! Hopefully she will open up her eyes and change. Friends are there to tell you when you step out of line. Which is exactly what you did! She may had not see it that way. Perhaps you and her can have another talk and work things out!

I'm sure it will be fine!
Francesca,

[moon29]

sadly i have been in your position so many times.  im surprised that it took 2o years for you to end a toxic relationship with your friend.  friendship is a lot like marriage you each have to give and receive or it will never amount to anything.

[Bigpar31]

To have something you never had, you have to do something you never did.

[bremer51]

I have a couple friends that are rather difficult. I don't think they really know how negative they can be.  I stick with them however, because they don't have many (or any) other friends. And, on occasion they surprise me a thoughtful, selfless act of kindness.

[champak97]

It is always good to end a toxic relationship. In the long run you will be fine.