This topic is locked, no replies allowed. Inaccurate or out-of-date info may be present.

  • Print

Topic: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?  (Read 3264 times)

skrogman

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Silver Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 1838 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 60x
Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« on: October 12, 2013, 02:47:54 am »
Occasionally, as the seasons change or the mood strikes, I like to re-arrange the furniture in my home for a different look.  However, I have been told that since I am living with a vision impaired boyfriend, that this is just cruel.  Is simply changing things really that wrong?

BJohnsonPP

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 319 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 25x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #1 on: October 12, 2013, 09:11:04 am »
Well, quite frankly, yes it's wrong. You're not "simply" changing things, you're rearranging his whole home life. At worst, for you, if the furniture stays the same, you get a little bored. At worst, for him, if the furniture is changed, he has to unnecessarily re-learn how to live in his own home as well as increase the potential of him harming himself.

I would hope you would ask him first and explain the lay out to him if he says ok. Keep in mind though, people say "ok" to things to be polite and not be the bad guy in the hopes that you'll think your way through it, consider them, and make the "right" decision yourself. .

I don't know him or your home life. That's just my take on it given the little bit of info I do have. Good luck with that.

Cuppycake

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 2910 (since 2008)
  • Thanked: 26x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #2 on: October 12, 2013, 09:24:02 am »
Occasionally, as the seasons change or the mood strikes, I like to re-arrange the furniture in my home for a different look.  However, I have been told that since I am living with a vision impaired boyfriend, that this is just cruel.  Is simply changing things really that wrong?

I agree it seems a bit selfish of you to do that to him just for the sake of aesthetics or whimsy...

tdillard

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 181 (since 2013)
  • Thanked: 27x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #3 on: October 12, 2013, 10:56:28 am »
I would have to agree that it is not very nice.
My ex-husband use to laugh and say it was a good thing he was not Helen Keller in our house, because I always changed the furniture around  he would never know where to sit if he couldn't see when he came home because of all of my rearranging. Before that never really thought about it alot, just liked to have change. So made me think it probably wasn't something even nice to do to someone who could see - should have left well enough alone.

angprescott

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 270 (since 2013)
  • Thanked: 11x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #4 on: October 12, 2013, 10:59:50 am »
Depends on what you mean by, Visually disabled, if he can not see at all, then yes, you  should only rearrange with his approval, but if he can see some (like a friend of mine) then changing around isn't that big a deal, just a warning is all that is needed.

msmoneybags48

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 2479 (since 2013)
  • Thanked: 137x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #5 on: October 12, 2013, 11:55:50 am »
I suggest you ask for his input.  That shows him that you care about his disability and that you want to change the room but care about his input.  Changing the room without his approval is just plain wrong.  You are leaving him out and expect him to accept the changes you made without his approval. :o :o :o :wave:

Nancy5

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Platinum Member
  • *********
  • Posts: 6813 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 405x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #6 on: October 12, 2013, 12:38:08 pm »
It really depends on how bad his sight is.  If it's bad, I would leave everything the way it is and not change anything.  If you're bored with the look, try making small changes, different colored throw pillows, change nick-nacks on tables that he doesn't use a lot, little things like that.  If his vision is just a little impaired, and you want to change furniture I would talk to him first, agree on moving certain pieces, and when done, tell him again what was changed.
*Image Removed*

Falconer02

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 3106 (since 2009)
  • Thanked: 90x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #7 on: October 12, 2013, 07:45:52 pm »
Hmmm....I think as long as you talk to him about it first it would be okay. I mean we've all been in the situation where it's pitch-dark in your own living room and you smash your foot into something your parents/bro/sis/roommate put there. It's aggrevating! Maybe make a plan with him where you can move the furniture, but it needs to only be in specific areas so he knows what to look out for. Make sure there's always clear paths and such.

skrogman

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Silver Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 1838 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 60x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #8 on: October 13, 2013, 04:50:17 am »
Thank you all for your input.  You were all very helpful and I really like and appreciate the suggestion of changing the pillows, color, and decor for a different look and feel to the room.  Those were great suggestions and now I am planning a Wal-Mart run!

:thumbsup: :wave:

bowrunner

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 2605 (since 2010)
  • Thanked: 47x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #9 on: October 13, 2013, 08:20:55 am »
Maybe you could just change one thing at a time so he can get used to changes gradually.

Mikena

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 334 (since 2010)
  • Thanked: 18x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #10 on: October 13, 2013, 09:37:37 am »
Occasionally, as the seasons change or the mood strikes, I like to re-arrange the furniture in my home for a different look.  However, I have been told that since I am living with a vision impaired boyfriend, that this is just cruel.  Is simply changing things really that wrong?
Wow. that is a hard question. I can understand how you like to change things around because I do the same thing. I also understand how someone might consider it to be an issue do to being visually impaired. I would imagine that change would bring on more difficulties for your boy-friend due too his impairment. You might could get him involved in the change and that would make him more comfortable with it. Hope that maybe this was a little help. :peace:

Barbara4321

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 58 (since 2013)
  • Thanked: 8x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #11 on: October 13, 2013, 03:08:28 pm »
I agree; it's important to have your boyfriend involved in the process.

mardukblood2009

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 3689 (since 2011)
  • Thanked: 61x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #12 on: October 15, 2013, 06:23:54 pm »
If he is on board with the idea or you tell him that you moved your furniture and where you have now placed it, I don't think there is anything wrong with that.
Now if you don't say a world that is pretty cruel. :-X

Sweetpea1228

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 138 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 5x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #13 on: October 20, 2013, 08:32:38 am »
I don't think you're intentionally being mean. Maybe talking to him and asking him and finding out his opinion would be best.

king4cash

    US flag
    View Profile
  • Gold Member
  • ********
  • Posts: 3176 (since 2012)
  • Thanked: 52x
Re: Do you think this is cruel or wrong?
« Reply #14 on: October 20, 2013, 08:54:14 am »
The simple solution is to let him know that you moving things around, and get him involve in the process, then he will be aware of where things are, and everyone will be the happier for it.

  • Print
 

Related Topics

  Subject / Started by Replies Last post
12 Replies
4140 Views
Last post December 27, 2009, 12:31:26 pm
by mlmhome
2 Replies
2076 Views
Last post July 09, 2008, 12:16:05 am
by blondeshorty85
4 Replies
2471 Views
Last post July 11, 2008, 01:39:10 pm
by VickieLand
Goodbye, Cruel World

Started by loulizlee « 1 2 ... 8 9 » in Off-Topic

121 Replies
7964 Views
Last post November 15, 2013, 05:19:05 pm
by crisstar
23 Replies
2735 Views
Last post October 06, 2013, 07:10:30 pm
by Storm61115