Why do people stay in abusive relationships?

[vernaj77]

I believe most of the time people stay in abusive relationships because they are scared. Also, I feel some of them have low self esteem and feel that can't do better.  I personally went through this years ago and it takes you to see your self worth and know that you deserve someone who loves you not hurt you.  Thank God for my finance truly God sent.

[thtrngng]

Some people are comfortable in these types of relationships and I will never understand why.  They are just cruising for a bruising.

[paints]

I stayed because I thought it was my fault, that there was something wrong with me, that I somehow deserved it.

I left when I realized all of that was a lie.

[Sendmicheck]

Most of the time children are involved and it is hard to leave them behind.  Personally, I will never understand.

[Nancy5]

I don't understand why, but I think sometimes the person thinks it's their fault, they did something wrong and they deserve to be hit.  Some come from a home where dad always hit mom so that's all they know.  Some are afraid to leave, where will I go?  Some think I have to stay for the kids, or if I leave, who will ever want me, I'm stupid, ugly, lazy, fat, etc.  It's so sad.

[heypeg]

I totally agree, I am not sure why but I think that people stay because they don't think they have any choices.

[Mikena]

I believe most of the time people stay in abusive relationships because they are scared. Also, I feel some of them have low self esteem and feel that can't do better.  I personally went through this years ago and it takes you to see your self worth and know that you deserve someone who loves you not hurt you.  Thank God for my finance truly God sent.

There are so many reasons why people stay in abusive relationships. I believe that alot of it has to do with the way they were brought up. Sometimes people stay with what they know. Low self esteem issues along with down right fear has an effect. I believe people who are abusive towards another family member should be punished. No one should have to go through life in a state of fear for themselves or whom ever else may be involved (kids). I absolutely hate abuse of any kind; be it human or animal.

[denton2244]

I believe most of the time people stay in abusive relationships because they are scared. Also, I feel some of them have low self esteem and feel that can't do better.  I personally went through this years ago and it takes you to see your self worth and know that you deserve someone who loves you not hurt you.  Thank God for my finance truly God sent.   I belive they stay  becoues they have no where  to go  or women or man that are getting abusive  are told they never be love no one will what them

[pmagalei]

I think it is because they are scared for their lives and if there are children involved, they are worried what might happen to them. How will they take care of themselves if the other person was their main source of financial stability? All in all they still have feelings for their significant other. All in the name of LOVE!

[vickysue]

Some are so browbeaten, abused and threatened that they are afried that they can't make it on their own. I was in one of those realtions for a brief time. But i had some counseling that helped me get out of it. I have seen some awful things that a lot of women have had done to them by the men. I worked with the battered womens for a while. It was awful. Transported a few  out of town or to other places of hiding to get away.  It just wants you to do the same to the men that hurt them and their children. When it comes to battered children i absoultley  can't stand  it.  Those poor children have no one at times to protect them. 

[jorhea]

My first husband was abusive when he drank. A lot of people, including his own family, said it couldn't be that bad. When I left him he went home to live with his twin brother and family. His brother said all those years he thought I was exaggerating but after he moved in with them he said he thinks it was way worse than I ever said. I was scared, 2 toddler children and going to school. One night after going out drinking again, he came home and said what a *bleep* and *bleep* I was (I never went anywhere without my kids so don't know how that could be!!) and shoved me into folding door that pinched my finger. I have never considered myself to be a violent person and always thought people were crazy when they said they saw red but that night it was like a cloud of red came down over me and I smacked him, split his lip and knocked him backwards over a couch. He went to get up and I stood there shaking and said if you get up you m*****f***** I will kill you and I must have looked like I meant it because he laid back down and didn't attempt to get up until I was gone. That was it for me. I could not let myself become that type of person. It still scares me (30 years later) when I think about what happened to me in those few minutes.

[hvnlydevil]

I think there are so many reasons. Some had an abusive relationship as an example growing up and accept that as love. Some are abused to the point that they feel it's deserved because they've been brainwashed to believe that. Some hope that the situation will change, or that they can change it. Others stay for fear of losing what they may lose (children) not fully understanding they've already lost themselves. Looking in from the outside, it's easy to say that one should leave, but so many factors go into their choice that others will never comprehend. You can only support and hope they find enough of themselves to trust that they can stand on their own and accept the love and respect from another they deserve.

[Dynamite2013]

Well I tried to get out of the relationships but as you said it is hard. I remember being bruised from head to toe and having a small infant to care for. But God got me through it and I am grateful now that I have a fantastic husband who gets along with me and I get along with him. In short we are not only sweethearts but we are also friends who enjoy the same things. I couldn't begin to know what my life would be like if he was missing from it. We have been happily married for 24 years and I know he is the only one I could be with. so if you are in a abusive relationship there is an out you just have to have faith and it will happen. Just don't be scared.

[zreeds]

I believe people stay in abusive relations they feel they have no other options and feel defeated.

[nguzman1]

I completely agree, with most ppl I ask they say they are scared to start over thus they rather settle with what they have incase they do worse.