Your mom's doctor or a Social Worker can help you make the decision as to where to place your mom IE: the good homes verus the others.
I will have to be placing my brother in the near future (55 with Dementia) At least there will be no family complications over this as none of the other siblings are either able nor want to take on the resposiblity of him & the decision is mine & I will keep him at home as long as possible until he becomes a danger to himself or others. The advice given to me was to: of course talk to people you may know that has had experience with nursing homes, also just stop in to check out a few without making an appointment to talk to someone. That way you see the place as it really is, not just how they want you to see it. A few months ago I was told my brother needed placed right then, the Social Worker at the hospital gave me a list of homes, pointed her finger to one of the places & shook her head. Her way of letting me know that was not a good place. Legally, she can't tell me which are the good ones, & which are the bad ones. There were 11 places on the list, one very close to me - so 1 bad one out of 11, I thought was good. Luckily, my brother snapped back and although he has his own apartment, we live in the same high rise & I am able to keep a close check on him & he was OK to come home after a switch in his medications.
Who is taking care of your mom now? Can't something be worked out - like each taking a month of keeping her. I can sympathize with you not wanting to place her.
Good luck honey - I understand how hard this must be for you.