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Topic: Depressed  (Read 1234 times)

blondie71

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Depressed
« on: April 16, 2014, 11:29:56 pm »
I hired my son's girlfriend to do my in home care and she has not been reliable she would get here late or call at the last minute today she text me and said she wouldn't be here.  My care is for 7 days a week as well as my husband so she really left us hanging.  We get help because of our health and she just didn't care. I have been paying her for the full 4 hours and 15 minutes she would get her an hour late and leave one hour and a half so I told her today I need her to stay the full time here next thing I know my son is texting me telling me she is going to quit what did I do wrong besides that I need her to do the work.
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Timberlan127

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #1 on: April 17, 2014, 03:26:31 am »
I don't think you did anything wrong except hire a family connection. She felt because she was dating your son it wasn't a real job with real responsibility. You will be better off hiring a person through an agency that scenes their help.

bettey13

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #2 on: April 17, 2014, 10:33:50 am »
Working with family can be a touchy situation, I would let her go, and try to get a professional. Good luck and God bless

catchow

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #3 on: April 17, 2014, 10:37:44 am »
How long has he been dating her? I personally dont know if I would want to take care of parents of someone I havent been dating very long. You didnt tell us how long :)

Probably best to get someone who is not family, that way ill feelings are not caused

Maybe she was just feeling uneasy about being so close to you both?

 

debidoo

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #4 on: April 17, 2014, 10:59:03 am »
You did nothing wrong except expect her to earn the money and do what you and your husband needed and qualified to get help with - seems like that is the way it usually works out with family and/or friends.  It is too bad - I would say she isn't a very ethical or clearly not a reliable person.  Get a professional and be done with it and don't feel bad.

jmccaskill

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #5 on: April 17, 2014, 12:21:23 pm »
I would have fired her long before now, your care is CRITICAL and there are a LOT of folks out there desperate for work, and I am sure very qualified for your needs. I have always had the policy of NEVER doing business with friends or family, especially family. You can't win, ever, don't even GIVE an old car to a friend! SERIOUSLY! I KNOW I have avoided a ton of family disputes and problems with my polivy.

BlackSheepNY

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #6 on: April 17, 2014, 01:35:45 pm »
I hired my son's girlfriend to do my in home care and she has not been reliable she would get here late or call at the last minute today she text me and said she wouldn't be here.  My care is for 7 days a week as well as my husband so she really left us hanging.  We get help because of our health and she just didn't care. I have been paying her for the full 4 hours and 15 minutes she would get her an hour late and leave one hour and a half so I told her today I need her to stay the full time here next thing I know my son is texting me telling me she is going to quit what did I do wrong besides that I need her to do the work.

You did nothing wrong.  It truly sounds like she's taking advantage of the situation because she dates your son.  I would not be paying her for the full hours that she was supposed to be there and wasn't.  If she wasn't quitting, I'd be firing her.

minioncookies

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #7 on: April 17, 2014, 01:59:31 pm »
Well... I would suggest stop paying her.. As Judge Judy would say.. If you eat the steak and you don't like it send it back.. Otherwise if you eat the steak you don't like it but you eat it anyway then you have to pay for the steak.

I suggest you find someone who is going to care enough and with enough training to help you.. Not someone who does not care.. does not have compassion.. and will just leave you hanging out in the cold..

I really don't understand why it is so hard for people to understand that if your treated bad or you don't like something then stop it...Why do people rather be a victim then putting your foot down and stopping the headache.. If she don't care don't pay her.. I wouldn't want someone i know to suffer.. and if they were suffering especially if they were paying for it i'd put an end to it.. It's nonsence to keep letting it go on.. Especially if the person don't care..(Sorry if i sound mean or rude.. I am not trying to be.. I just don't understand the concept of letting people walk all over you)

ancmetro

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #8 on: April 17, 2014, 03:10:03 pm »

    Find reliable help!

davidh121

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #9 on: April 17, 2014, 09:18:33 pm »
Definitely find someone else. Apparently she's not leaving a good impression, which I feel would otherwise be surprising as a person would usually try to do good and make an impression if they care about someone (in this case your son), but maybe it's an upbringing.

rmyers12

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #10 on: April 17, 2014, 09:57:45 pm »
some people are not going to be reliabe, it sucks! i am sorry you are going through a hard time. this is not your fault. she just didnt care about her job apparently.

nannycoe1

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #11 on: April 18, 2014, 02:11:44 am »
Please get a non family member through an agency if you can afford it.

Dynamite2013

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #12 on: April 18, 2014, 04:36:32 am »
It is possible she is unable to deal with it and that is the reason she is leaving early and arriving late. You must hire a professional who is equipped to handle the situation.

ngorecki

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #13 on: April 18, 2014, 04:50:18 am »
You didn't do anything wrong. It's too bad you paid her, sounds like she owes you. It's a shame that your son thinks you did something. hopefully he'll see what she is,and leave her!

Nancy5

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Re: Depressed
« Reply #14 on: April 18, 2014, 06:50:31 am »
The only thing you did wrong was hire your son's girlfriend.  I know you thought by dating him you would fine someone you could count on.  Sadly that didn't happen.    I don't know your financial situation, but if you can afford it I would call an agency.  If not, try placing an ad in the newspaper (you can't get a less reliable person than she was), or try calling social security, if you are disabled maybe they have resources to help you.  I know it's a hard situation when you need help and can't get it.  Good luck to you and your husband and I hope you get the care you both deserve.
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